The Adventures of Sarada Uchiha
by 20hagenc
Summary: Sarada: a shy 12 year old girl who is trying to figure things out. Puberty is her worst enemy and it sometimes seems as if the entire world is against her. How will Sarada survive this never-ending nightmare? Trigger warning. It progresses quickly, however I try to make it accurate. For those who have been in the same place as us: I'm so sorry and I hope this gives you some peace.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Note: Hey, I'm Emma and I hope you enjoy my fanfiction! Please give me any comments, suggestions, or questions and I will answer them as soon as I can!

"Mother, I'm home.." Sarada called into the house, walking up to the wooden kitchen table and setting down her backpack neatly. Her mother came in soon afterwards and smiled at her daughter, eyes wrinkling in affection. Sarada would never have any idea how precious she was to Sakura. Her and Sasuke both.

"How was school today?"

"It was fine. Normal, like always...Boruto being an idiot again."

Here we go again, Sakura thought. "What happened this time?"

Suddenly, Sarada went silent. After a few moments of unusual stillness, Sakura turned to find that her daughter had turned bright red. "Whoa, now I really need to know, what happened?"

"Nothing important," Sarada mumbled, before getting out her homework from her beige book bag. "I have to go somewhere. I'll be right back." With that, she disappeared into thin air. All Sakura had done was blink.

"Weird," she spoke aloud, sighing and putting her hands on her hips, "I'll have to find out what's up later."

Meanwhile, Sarada was running to her most favorite place in the village, the forest. For some reason, she had always felt wild and free in the forest, covered by protective trees. It made her feel comforted. Sarada wasn't sure if she would be able to face her parents ever again.

Bolt hadn't exactly been an idiot. In fact, he was actually telling a truthful fact for once. It was just really, really, inappropriate. Yup. Bolt taught her how babies were made. The birds and the bees. And it was nothing how Sarada had originally thought it would be.

She sighed, slumping against a rather large and shady oak tree and staring up at the cloudy sky. She could have sat there and just stared for hours. Sarada had always been an observer. Personally, she thought that her inquisitive personality was a gift. But that was just her. Apparently, others didn't think so. That's why her observations of Boruto could not be spoken of, ever. He'd never speak to her again. The thought alone made her feel a bit sick.

"Funny to see you here," a feminine voice sneered. Sarada's head snapped up to see a brunette from her class. She groaned internally. The brunette had recently been stressing her about helping her understand the current subject, the Kyuubi's attack. She figured that her attempts of avoiding and ignoring the girl had gone in vain and made her desperate.

"Look, I'm busy right now-"

"Doing what? Cloud watching?" The girl mocked her. Sarada's eyes narrowed.

"I have my own problems. You have yours. Now buzz off." Okay, so maybe she was being a little cold. Whatever. It's not like she needed friends anyway.

"You'll pay for this!" She fumed, glaring angrily at Sarada before storming off. Sarada's eyes returned to the sky.

When the sun had begun to set, she had already finished her homework and thought about everything that seemed to be bothering her. Her mother told her that keeping a diary was good, but Sarada didn't dare. She knew it was only an excuse to see what was going on in her life and how she was feeling. She didn't like invasions of privacy. Sarada stood up and brushed all the dust and dirt off of her red skirt. Her glasses had begun to get blurry, and she knew that once she got home, she would have to wash them. She didn't know what she would do without them.

Sarada was surprised to see that her mother had been waiting for her to return right by the door, anxiously. A second after she had shut the door, Sarada found herself face to face with an extremely concerned Sakura Uchiha.

"Honey?! Are you alright? What happened? Why didn't you come home earlier? When you missed dinner, I began to get really worried-"

"I'm sorry, mother. I was just working on my homework, it was particularly hard this time." Sarada lied, cutting off her mother's rambling, not wanting to withstand a lecture for an hour. "I have to wash my glasses," she added quickly to avoid further questioning.

As Sarada busied herself with cleaning the dirt off of her red glasses, Sakura couldn't help but feel that her daughter was hiding something from her. To her confusion, she also felt a strange sort of..foreboding type of feeling. All Sakura could do was wish for it to go away. She decided to confront her daughter later. After all, it wasn't like she had taken to herself sometimes as well.

* * *

Sarada woke up sweating. She had forgotten what her dream had been about, but she didn't really want to know. It took a lot to get her scared, and when she finally did get scared, it was something that worried her for at least the rest of the day. She rolled her shoulders, yawning and stretching herself out of bed.

Downstairs, she could hear her mother calling her name, reminding her that breakfast was ready. Sarada groaned and cracked her neck before tiptoeing down the stairs of the two story apartment. It had become a habit, after all, she was training to be a ninja.

"Sarada, there you are! You scared me with that stealth of yours... Come now, while breakfast's still hot. I have your bento right here," Sakura handed her daughter a pink and white polka-dotted lunch bin. Sarada gladly took it, her stomach rumbling at the knowledge of food in her hands.

She sat down and ate her eggs swiftly, noticing between bursts of air that her mother was chuckling, amused. She rolled her eyes but smiled despite her annoyance. After she was done, which did not take long at all, she strode out of the kitchen and to the walkway placed right before the door leading to the outside world. There stood her backpack in all its glory. She grabbed it quickly as she took hold of the doorknob. Guilt stopped her from leaving.

"Mom?"

"Yes, honey?" Sakura's distant voice melodically floated around the corner to the walkway, where Sarada stood nervously. She took a deep breath. One. Two

"Bolt told me about sex." Three. She slammed open and close the door before she could hear Sakura's response. She was afraid her mother would be mad at her for using such a inappropriate world at the age of 12. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Sarada, Sakura was laughing her ass off, her hands covering her red face.

Oh, Sarada, she thought, I'm so sorry! You poor soul!

Sarada walked faster than she ever had in her entire life. Her face was red, her lips were sputtering in breaths of air, and her glasses kept slipping down her nose. To any bystander, she would seem pretty stressed. But on the inside, she was extremely relieved. It hurt her on the inside to keep a secret from mother dearest. Her mother was the best mother she could ever have, they went out on the weekends, had their own celebratory shopping days for ninja materials and books, and most importantly, Sarada could talk about anything to the pink-haired kunoichi. Even the deeply personal stuff. She wasn't about to stop now.

As the raven haired girl approached the Ninja Academy, she felt like something was off. She looked up just in time to see snickering faces before she passed out, feeling a huge weight on her head.

* * *

Pain. That was the first thing she woke up to. Sarada groaned and clutched her head as if her life depended on it


	2. Realization

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Notes: THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT! I LOVE YOU GUYS! Also, sorry about the crappy first chapter, I promise I'll be better about this.

Sarada finally gained the courage to look at her surroundings. _Something a good ninja would do,_ Sarada tells herself mentally. She sees a huge rock sitting beside her, the object that must have fallen down on her head, making her pass out cold for a few minutes. She looks up slowly, hoping not to irritate the large, throbbing bump on her head even more. Lying face down on the concrete evidently hadn't helped that much.

And there she was. The brunette that had pestered her before, in the woods. She stood on top of the roof of the Academy, a smug look on her face that read "I told you so". Sarada felt a burst of rage. Her eyes felt like they were melting, her heart burning, everything was on fire. She had never felt this way before.. She would never admit it, but Sarada kind of liked this new feeling. It gave her a sense of control. She continued to glare at the girl with all she had.

The brunette's smirk washed off her face at the sight of the other girl's Sharingan Death Glare. She shivered, but stood her ground. She had started this, and she intended to end it. With her own victory, of course.

Sarada got up, her eyes never leaving the girl. She had her undivided attention now, just like the girl had wanted. She slowly brushed the dirt and dust off of her scuffed knees and clenched her teeth, tears threatening to give way. The anger had begun to fade, and in its place was the forlorn emotion of sadness. But Sarada couldn't have that. She just couldn't. Not without winning this fight. Otherwise she would be a failure to both herself and her family name. The Academy had taught her all about the prestigious Uchihas. She wasn't going to be the one to tarnish such a name.

"Come down and fight me, you coward, shannarooo!" Sarada snarled, her fists clenching, her knees bent, back curled like a cat's. By now, everyone nearby was staring and watching in anticipation. The girl was now pale, her smirk long gone. Instead, an angry scowl rested there.

"Challenge accepted, you bitch!" Sarada didn't know what the hell "bitch" meant, but she assumed it was bad. The girl jumped from the roof, landing perfectly on her two feet without stumbling once. Not bad. So, she had chakra control, so what? It didn't mean anything, compared to her at least.

The two circled each other, concentrating. The girl made the first move when Sarada sent a sneer at her and spit on her face.

"Disgusting!" She screamed, lunging forward, her claws ready, teeth gnashing, "You freak!" Sarada's feet stumbled, giving in to the adrenaline rush, and the girl's nails slashed across her face. Immediately, it throbbed and she felt a hot liquid running down her cheek. Sarada's anger returned tenfold. She roared and clenched her fist and swung, fully expecting to land a hit. And she did. Her fist struck cartilage, and a crack resounded throughout the city. A howl of pain followed by the sound of a body hitting dirt. The sight of her enemy clutching her nose, crying, defeated. She tasted iron, and smelled it coming from the girl on the ground too. The fight was over.

Sarada was still simmering with adrenaline. "Is that it?!" She huffed, the same smirk that the girl had had on her face now on hers.

"You monster.. What have you done?!" A woman came from the crowd, glaring at her with fury. She rushed to her child, cradling her in her arms comfortingly.

The word monster kept echoing in Sarada's head, and tears sprung to her eyes once more. She was just like the bully. _How disgraceful,_ a voice in her head whispered disapprovingly.

"I-I'm sorry..Let me help you." The lost child reached out, only to get her hands slapped away by the girl's mother. A single glare was all she needed.

She ran, because running away was the only thing she could do. She ran to the forest, her haven, her home, and cried, cried, cried. She cried for herself at first, self-pitying, but then it transformed into self hatred right before her eyes. She cried because she couldn't stand being in her own skin. She cried because she didn't want to be herself anymore.

She cried all alone, grieving for her lost self and hating the new.

When Sarada was dry out of tears, the sun had set. So much had happened in one day, she couldn't process it all.

By the end of her crying, she had realized one thing.

She was not a bully. She had not changed. She was perfectly fine.

She was almost embarrassed by her own actions and thoughts. Of course she was not a bully. She was a **victim** , is what she was.

She was not a monster.

* * *

Sarada slept like she had never slept before. She hadn't dreamed, just completely passed out. She woke up frazzled, and in blissful ignorance. That is, until she remembered what had happened the day before.

"Mom!" She yelled, bolting upright, her eyes wide with panic. She was still in the forest, she realized dumbly. Her mother must be losing her mind, worrying about her. Sarada quickly gathered herself and began stumbling through the wild trees, the wind pushing them around like puppets. Multiple roots sent her sprawling with an "oof!" and a thump. But each time she got right back up again, paying the root no mind, as she was too worried about her mother. She wondered how she could do such a thing to Sakura.

 _Because you're a sad excuse for a daughter,_ the voice hissed. It was back. Sarada had expected the voice to be a one time thing, a "been there, done that". She realized now that that was far from the truth. It was something that had only just begun. Great. Another thing to be stuck with.

As she finally exited the forest, she bumped into a kid her age with vivid, spiky blond hair rather violently.

"Sarada? Is that you?" Boruto cocked his head, looking at her funny. Sarada blushed. It had to be him, of all people. The one person who wanted to "protect her" when she became the Hokage.

"No, it's not." Sarada grumbled, still irritated that she had to bump into him. She had been trying to ignore him and give him not a second glance ever since he declared he would protect her, but the plan had failed miserably. But she had never really given up on it, not ready to give in to the truth that she had fallen for him.

"Man, I haven't seem you since yesterday! You really got into a bad one this time, huh, Sarada?" His face crumpled into a sad , melancholic frown as his eyes set on her bloodied cheek. "What were you thinking?"

Sarada stared at Boruto, shocked that he would ask such a thing. It wasn't her fault. It never was! Obviously, the bully had provoked her. Adrenaline once again raced through her veins as her insides fired up.

"Me? Aren't you asking the wrong person?" Sarada narrowed her eyes and leaned forward, poking him in the chest. Boruto's eyes widened, surprised. Then, they crumpled back into that stupid melancholic stare, pissing her off. What was with him? She wasn't someone to be pitied, for crying out loud!

"Come with me. Your mother is worried," Boruto stated as lifelessly as utterly possible. His hand reached out to her, then dropped. He led the way back home.


	3. Boys are Stupid

**Chapter 3**

 **Disclaimer: I WISH I owned Naruto. But I don't.**

 **Notes: Hey, sorry if there was some confusion on the last chapter, I should have explained more into it. Basically, Sarada convinced herself as a coping mechanism that nothing was her fault and that she wasn't a monster so that she could go on normally. Which she isn't. Or is she? DUN DUN DUN! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

Sarada stood at the entrance of her house, Boruto right beside her. She absentmindedly lifted her hand to her shoulder, only to realize that the book bag she usually carried was gone. She groaned as her head swung back in frustration. She must have dropped it when she got hit with that stupid rock. She hadn't even registered that, and usually she wouldn't go ANYWHERE without that bag..

"Sarada." Boruto's voice boomed in her ears despite the fact that he had whispered, making Sarada jump right out of her own skin. Senses alert, she glared at Boruto for disrupting her thought processes.

"What is it, Boruto? What do you want?" She interrogated, sick and tired of people at the moment. Boruto blushed, looking at the ground, concerning the raven haired girl at his side. She put one hand on her hip, and jut her hip out, sighing. "Just tell me, shannaro..." Boruto took this as a warning sign, eyes looking at random objects as he panicked.

"You know how I told you about how babies are made...?...

Well, you...you wanna make one together?"

Sarada couldn't believe her ears. What?! The blood in her veins turned to ice, then fire, rushing to her head and making it explode. Her shallow, relaxed breaths became quick and panicky. She felt the burning sensation as tears entered her eyes once more. Her hands shook, her head was spinning, and she couldn't breathe..

Sarada was scared to death.

Unknowing Boruto took a step forward, eyes meeting hers. Sarada couldn't move, her nerves weren't registering anymore. Her brain was still processing his words. His cheeks were as red as hers, breaths combining because their faces were so close, and he leaned in, aiming for her lips. That's when Sarada's nerves finally decided to react.

She ran, like she always does. She left poor Boruto in the dust, confused and humiliated. The raven's tears spilled over like a waterfall, as she tried to breathe through her desperate sobs of fear. Why was this all happening to her? Why was the world forcing her to run on and on and on? Why was the world so cruel? Why was Boruto acting this way? Why would he play such a mean joke on her?

Sarada knew what sexual harassment was, but she never thought she would be a victim to it. There was no way he was actually being genuine. He knew about her crush on him and decided to rub it all in her face that he would never return her feelings.

Boys are stupid.

And that's when she heard a voice that sounded so sickeningly familiar. "Sarada!" She stopped in her tracks at the sound of her name. Just the person she needed. Maybe the world wasn't so cruel after all.

"Mom," she sobbed, trembling and racing to the hospital entrance, where her mother stood, green eyes wide with surprise and relief, pink hair messy and uncombed, the cause probably being Sarada herself. Sakura never paused to straighten her hair if there was someone she loved in trouble. Or, at least, missing. In Sarada's case, the worry was doubled, being her daughter and all.

They met each other halfway, crushing each other with their own need. Sarada sobbed, Sakura joined the party as Sarada felt her shoulder getting wet, and strangers walked right by as if this happened every day. It probably did, considering they were in front of the hospital.

"Oh, Sarada, I was so worried when you didn't return home.. I thought something terrible had happened to you.. Oh, Sarada.."

"Mom, you will never believe the days I've been having.. God, it's been horrible.. I need you so much, Mom, I promise never to leave you again.."

They both spoke at exactly the same time, taking a moment of silence to realize that as their beautiful laughter erupted throughout the cold air. Urgent breaths somehow managed to calm both of them down. Just the essence of knowing the other was alive was enough. Soon enough, Sakura was finally able to let Sarada go for a second and ask her the questions that had been burning in her mind ever since she realized Sarada wasn't coming back home.

"Where were you?"

"I was in the forest, Mom, I was in the forest, and I-I accidentally fell asleep.. I'm so sorry!" Sarada struggled to remain calm and not to burst out sobbing once more. She didn't want to worry her Mom anymore than she already had.

"Why did you fall asleep? Why didn't you come home first after school? Was there anything that happened beforehand? You know you can always talk to me, right?"

"Mom, I know, I just.. I just... It was Boruto," Sarada lied straight through her teeth. It was the first time she had ever dared to do such a thing to her own mother. She had never ever lied to her before about crises. Why was this one any different? Alas, Sarada didn't have the answer to her own question. Her questioning mind grew louder. _Tell her everything. Tell her about the bully. Tell her that you're a monster. Tell her all about you evil doings. Tell her about that girl's bloody, broken nose. Tell her EVERYTHING!_ The voice rose and rose until Sarada mentally stuffed it into a box, locked it, and threw away the key. Her mind finally fell silent.

"Oh, honey.." Sakura looked down at her daughter, pitying her. Sarada hated her in that moment. She hated pity. That was the moment that Sarada decided from then on that her own mother, the one who had been by her side since the day she was born, was not on her side. And this was war. No more heart-to-heart talks, nothing. She couldn't trust her anymore. Not after she had betrayed her in that tiny way.

They walked back home, holding hands. Her mother humming sweet affirmations, Sarada telling just as sweet lies. Saarada was kind of surprised when they got home, as she was expecting to see Boruto still standing there. She didn't know why she thought that, but quickly shook the thought out of her mind forever.

* * *

They ate dinner silently, enjoying the company of each other, something Sarada would never fully admit to herself. Sarada decided that tomorrow she would go to the Academy, get her bag back, and go home. There was so way she was facing that bully again. She couldn't do it. Everything she hoped to forget would be remembered. And maybe that in itself was her greatest fear.

* * *

Sarada went upstairs, trudging step by step, silently muttering a "shannaro" of irritation as her calves ached from yesterday's and today's abuse. She wondered what the next day had in store for her. Sarada hoped it wasn't as terrible as the last two days. She hoped she would be given a fucking break.

The raven pushed open her bedroom door with little conviction, wincing at how it creaked. She crawled into bed, snuggling into her covers and almost crying **again** at the complete and utter comfort of the purple sheets. The only thing stopping her was her pride, or what was left of it.

And then Sarada slept. She slept for the rest of the night, dreaming of being chased and hunted by an unknown creature. Another dream that Sarada would be glad to forget in the morning. Another dream gone to waste.

 **Notes: HEHEHEHE so Sarada's having it pretty rough, am I right? I'm sorry, I love to torture characters. This is only the beginning, my friends.**


	4. The Crows

**Chapter 4**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and probably never will. Sometimes, dreams don't come true.**

 **Notes: Thank you guys for being so generous. I love you more than anything else! This is for you!**

Sarada wakes up before anybody else in the house, which just consists of her and her mom, Sakura. She just had another night terror, but, again, can't quite remember what had happened. She got a feeling of déjà vu, but shook it off. She couldn't continuously go on like this. If the world was not going to change, she will change it herself. This was the exact confidence that would make her Hokage.

After looking up at her pink calendar right in front of her bed, she realizes that, also for the first time ever, she did not finish her homework that night. How could she, if she was still missing her precious beige bag? Speaking of which, she needed to find it today for the Academy, otherwise she was screwed.

Sarada quickly tuned her mind in to other things, ignoring the protests of her mind that told her that not doing her homework was a warning sign for her. She was surprised it was still on her side. However, Sarada had a feeling this fragile alliance wouldn't last long. She was right.

The 12 year old brushed her hair and her teeth, that is, after she made herself an omelet. Being the daughter of a working medic means you had to learn how to take care of yourself once in a while. She got dressed, and was honestly more than ready to learn who her teammates were in approximately-she looked over at her calendar- three days. It was almost the end of her days at that Academy, and she was ready to start her missions, for crying out loud!

As she walked to school, crows cawed all around her. It gave her a feeling of safety, but she didn't know why. Just another thing to add to the list. She looked around for her book bag but did not see it anywhere nearby, nor was it in the spot that she (probably) left it.

She enters through the front doors, bracing herself for hate and violence. What she got in return was much worse. Stares and disapproval. The brunette bully is not there, but it feels like she is with all the people staring at her hatefully. But not Boruto. He was avoiding her gaze, looking angry at himself. Her heart dropped. Of all people, she didn't expect **him** to be avoiding **her**. He was the one who was harassing her. Right?

Sarada couldn't believe her ears at that moment in time, and every time she replays the memory in her head, she still can't believe them. What the hell did that mean? Why would he mess with her head like that, and then avoid her? They were only twelve for goodness sake! Was that really all boys thought about? What was all this even about?! Sarada was so confused. She didn't know what to think of Boruto anymore. So she just ignored him right back.

Although she looked like she was focusing on her sensei's every word, that was far from the truth. She couldn't focus at all. Not with Boruto staring right at her when he didn't think she was looking. Not with that idiot girl on her mind, laughing at her as she dangled her precious bag over a cliff. Not with this awful headache, this awful heaviness weighing on her brain, making her feel down, down, down..

"Sarada!" Said girl hiccupped and jumped in her seat. To her complete and utter embarrassment, the entire class started to laugh out loud. Sarada blushed a deep, deep tomato red.

"Y-yes? Sensei?" She stuttered, eyes finding her fists in her lap so much more fascinating than the teacher's own eyes.

Shino sighed. He had noticed Sarada was not paying attention because of that glazed look in her eyes. Just to test if his theory was correct, he asked a question he knew only Sarada couldn't resist to answer to.

"Who was the only survivor of the Uchiha Massacre?" Although they covered this topic a long time ago, this was the only question Shino knew of that Sarada would answer to, for the off chance that she would be distracted. She was his favorite student, after all. He had a irresistible question to each student, just in case. Caution was the best answer to everything. And in this case, he was right.

"My father, sir.." She answered in monotone, shocking Shino. He knew this was Sarada by her chakra, but maybe this was a Sarada he didn't know. A Sarada that was ill.

The bell rang, and Sarada was the first to stand up and gather her things as she rushed to the door. Before Shino could call her name, however, the front doors had already shut close. He sighed in frustration. He would find out what was up with Sarada, whether she liked it or not.

* * *

Sarada held on to her sanity as tightly as she could. She clenched her teeth, willing for the burning sensation behind her eyes to go away. Not today. Not again. Everything was fine, she had just been singled out in class, that's it. Nothing too major, nothing terrible. Kids could go through so much worse. But none of her inner dialogue was making her feeling any better. It only made her feel worse.

She finally got control of herself by the time she got home. She was fine now. She hadn't cried. That gave her some of her pride back. The reason why she didn't immediately go to the forest was because she didn't want to be a burden to her mother again. She couldn't do that to her anymore. Her mother wouldn't be able to deal with it. She would be convinced something was truly wrong. Sarada didn't know how many more excuses she could come up with, but decided to stop there.

 _Wasn't something truly wrong already?_ The voice whispered, mocking her, laughing manically. Sarada figured her mind was beginning to switch sides. She wish it would just choose one already. When had she become so bipolar?

She realized as soon as she reached the door, panting, she had forgotten to write down that day's homework. Another night without doing her homework. And she didn't even care. What was happening to her?

She sighed, disappointed in herself.

 _What have you done?_ Her mind hissed, now officially against Sarada.

That same heaviness from before came back tenfold, and the raven groaned, clutching her head. She whimpered, stumbling to the medicine cabinet in her mother's bathroom. She sat on the toilet, and poured some tap water into a spare cup on one of the shelves. She drank down two Advil and sighed, already feeling the pressure fade a bit.

The crows cawed around the house once more, and this time, Sarada didn't feel safe. She felt scared, and wondered when exactly she had changed from getting scared once in a long time, to once every day. All of a sudden, she got the idea that the crows were watching her, keeping tabs on her. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.

"Go away!" She screamed desperately from her spot on the toilet. "Leave me alone!" Her heart beat faster, and only got quicker and quicker every time she heard another crow caw. Finally, they stopped cawing and flew away. Sarada breathed again. That is, until, she heard a knock at the door.

 _Well, now, maybe it's the brunette, coming to give you back your bag,_ her mind sneered and Sarada ignored the sarcastic jab.

She walked over to the door and looked through the peephole. She couldn't believe her eyes. Were all of her senses failing her? It was a tall man in a dark cloak, with raven black hair hanging over one side of his face, kind of like Sarada's own hairstyle. She gasped as he suddenly spoke,

"Sakura? It's me. I'm home."

It was Sasuke, her father, the one and only survivor of the Uchiha Massacre


	5. Welcome Home

**Chapter 5**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. PERIOD.**

 **Notes: Hello there!**

Sarada's mind raced with questions left unanswered. Why was he here? Didn't he have an "important mission" to do? Why didn't he tell them he was coming home?Did anyone now he was coming home, or did he just drop out of thin air without anyone knowing? Why did he decide to come home now, a month after her birthday. when he was originally going to come back? Sarada only got angrier, these questions festering in her head and in her heart. She was about to walk away, leave him standing there alone, give him a taste of his own medicine, when he spoke again.

"Sarada? Is that you?"

Said girl stopped right in her tracks. She argued with herself, fighting over whether she should let him in or not. She rushed back to the door before her mind could protest. She let him in.

"It really is you. I'm home, Sarada." He gave her a soft smile that was full of so many emotions that all the anger she originally had was washed coldly away and replaced by the hard reality of shock. Her eyes swam with tears, and this time she didn't let them drown.

"Papa," she murmured, and outstretched her arms cautiously, silently asking for permission. After so many months, she wasn't sure of anything involving her father anymore. Did he long for them? Or had he moved on? She knew he was protecting them-from afar. She knew he was protecting the whole village. But, damn, what about their family time? She wanted to hurt him in such a tiny way, barely evident, but enough to sting. She hoped her hesitance would provide a good example of how much he had damaged her-her and Sakura both.

Sasuke's smile faded. He pushed his daughter into his arms with a lot more force than what was necessary. Sarada's goal had been achieved. Was it selfish? To act in such a way? She was reminded of the way she had been so furious that she broke that girl's nose. She cringed. Sasuke noticed.

He pulled her even tighter to his chest, thinking his daughter was doubting his love for her. He couldn't believe Sarada would ever think that way for a second. How long was it this time? It hadn't been as long as other had in the past. So why was this one different? Had something happened?

"Sarada," he spoke so softly that Sarada had to strain her ears to hear him, "what happened while I was gone?"

The girl cringed once more. Her heartbeat quickened and she knew she couldn't trust him either. She realized there and then that she had decided to doubt her own parents, the only ones who had been on her side... Now, she had nobody. She was alone. But, maybe..maybe, it was better that way.

"Papa, nothing has happened. It's been pretty boring here, actually. Except for the fact that I graduate in 3 days..I just missed you so much..Will you be here?" Sasuke crouched down to look straight into Sarada's eyes, making her uncomfortable and feeling more vulnerable than before.

"Of course I will be here, Sarada. I'm going to stay for a month or two. I would never miss your graduation." He didn't know what he was saying. He had been so close to missing it. How could he say he would never miss it when he had missed her birthday, just like that? Most of her birthdays, even? It infuriated her. She paid no mind to that fact that a "month or two" was the longest he had ever stayed home. What she didn't know was that, after hearing that his daughter's graduation day was coming up, Sasuke pleaded with Naruto to lengthen his stay. Naruto had easily obliged.

Sarada ripped herself from Sasuke's grasp and was about to march to her room when Sasuke stopped her.

"Sit. Let's talk." Sarada internally groaned at how willingly her body responded to her father's commands. She turned around, and marched into the living room instead, sitting vertically from her father. "Now, tell me what _really_ happened while I was gone." The girl flinched. How had he known?! Was she that obvious?!

"What are you talking about, P-papa?" Dammit! Damn it all! She had practically given herself away!

 _Why do you always mess everything up?_ Her mind growled at her, making her head spin with guilt.

"You know what I'm talking about, Sarada." He gave no explanation, staring at her intently, his hands folded neatly and calmly in his lap. Sarada felt like breaking down and spilling everything. She wanted someone to finally listen, shannaro! But her pride was stronger, holding her broken pieces together like super glue. She didn't back down, not just yet.

"Actually, I don't. Would you care to explain?" Sarada felt like she was playing a game of life or death chess. She could literally slice the tension with a knife. Sasuke narrowed his eyes and leaned forward, intimidating her, thought she would never admit it. She straightened her back even more so.

"Sarada. Please. We're a family."

"Are we now?! When did we become so close?!" Sarada yelled, shooting to her feet. Sasuke frowned, at her shaking fists. She was seething. How dare he call them a family when he had barely been there! How dare he barge in and ruin all that she has built, all her walls! "What's my fucking favorite color, **DAD**?!"

He stood just as abruptly as she had, shocking her, making her take a step back in surprise. He was visibly struggling to contain his anger. Sarada waited for him to calm down, for him to give her a response. He sat back down, his eyebrows furrowed, eyes shut tightly.

"Purple."

"Who told you that bullshit?!" Sarada lied, inwardly shocked he had guessed right. He was standing again, glaring at each other. Not even a knife could cut the tension now.

"Stop. Swearing. Sarada. You are. A lady," he paused, trying to calm down so he could speak clearly, "Where did you. Learn those words?"

"Where do you think?" Sarada laughed bitterly, her hiccups showing that she was close to sobbing. She took a step back, only to realize that she was trapped. At the hospital, as she changed out of her medical uniform, Sakura sneezed. She wondered if the patient from earlier had given her his fever?

Sasuke chuckled, then started to full on laugh maniacally. This was more of a nervous, tension-filled laugh. Sarada began to giggle as well, both laughing at their predicament. He walked towards her, reaching for her.

"Oh, Sarada, please trust me. I love you." That was the moment in which her pride had given up, and she was allowed to escalate her earlier cries into sobs. She ran into Sasuke's welcoming arms before spilling everything on her mind.

"Papa, I broke a girl's nose because she kept picking on me, and I didn't know what else to do! She kept provoking and provoking me, and I couldn't stop myself. I'm a monster! Boruto is harassing me, and now he's avoiding me and I'm so confused, and now I'm so lonely, I'm all alone, so alone.. I can't take it, my head's been hurting lately, and I haven't been able to pay attention in class and now everyone hates me! I'm a monster! Monster! Monster! Monster," she shrieked, only stopping when Sasuke yelled at the top of his lungs, stopping her in her tracks.

"Stop it!" He paused to let Sarada quiet her sobs before continuing in a softer tone of voice. "You are NOT a monster, Sarada. You are my daughter and you are NOT alone. You are loved. I love you, Sarada. I love you so much it hurts. Don't be lonely. I'm here now." He comforted her as she cried, and for once she felt the love of a parent. She kept nodding, and wouldn't stop, not for the world. She needed her father to know how she felt because of him. If not vocally, then physically.

Sasuke smiled, accepting her nods as a sign of trust. He held her tighter, his cloak draping over the two of them and shaping them as if they were one.

They froze as the door opened and Sakura came in to find them both hugging each other and crying softly. Sakura wasn't surprised at her husband's crying, she knew how much of a softie Sasuke truly was. But, Sarada..

"What the fuck is going on here?" Sakura demanded. Sasuke and Sarada looked up at each other, and began to grin. If anyone taught their daughter about swearing, it would have been Sakura.


	6. Secrets

Sarada stormed up the steps to her room, slamming the door and locking it. Their talk had not gone well. They dared to **belittle** her suffering.

 _How dare they. How dare they!_ Sarada fumed, clenching her teeth and pacing about her room. She had told them even about the hours earlier, when she had come home, about the crow incident, and they didn't even take her seriously. She felt humiliated. Why had she expected them to be better than they were? Hadn't she decided not to trust them? What had happened to that? There was a reason she had promised that to herself, after all. Her parents did have a record of not being there for her. And now wasn't an exception.

She hated to remember, but wasn't able to forget. She had explained everything that she explained to Sasuke, but added the foreign voice in her head that was against her. Sakura had laughed at first, then nervously commented a quiet "oh". Her mother then tried to relate, but what was the point? The "Inner Sakura" she told Sarada about was just Sakura's true thoughts that couldn't be spoken aloud for obvious reasons. Sasuke had been able to relate a little bit more.

Sasuke took a deep breath. "When I was your age-" he started, before getting cut off by his wife immediately.

"Sasuke, you don't have to do this," she murmured, rubbing her husband's back and looking at him with urgent eyes. Sasuke simply shook his head.

"It's about time she knew. She's twelve now. I think she'll be able to handle it." _His voice shook a little,_ Sakura noted.

"But, Sasuke.." His wife pleaded, staring at him with admiration at what he was about to do. He waved her off, and Sakura withdrew her hands and put them in her lap. She fidgeted, playing with her hands, waiting to see her daughter's reaction. Sasuke started again.

"When I was your age, I had something that, I found out later, was depression. After the Massacre, I felt like everyone was against me, even myself. But then all that changed and channeled into hatred for my brother. I gave myself a reason to live. And that was how I overcame it.

"What I'm thinking is that you may have the same condition I had as well. Only, something must have triggered it.."

"I was bullied! Boruto and that other girl!" Sarada jumped in quickly, hoping to get answers from her father after realizing he was actually a pretty reliable source. Okay, so she may have left out the type of abuse each person had done to her because of her father being there, but that's not the point!

"My entire family was murdered, Sarada, we're talking about a greater event," Sasuke sighed, not giving his annoyed daughter a second glance.

"Well, people have different levels of pain they can handle, Papa. I may be a little more sensitive." She hated to say it out loud, but she had a feeling she was right. Sasuke cocked an eyebrow at her, confusing her. "What?"

"A daughter of mine? Sensitive? Not in a million years," he smirked, shaking his head, eyes closed. The girl couldn't help but get frustrated at her father's ignorance. Although, it did sound incredibly stupid now that he said that..

"Whatever. I'm tired. I'll see you guys tomorrow," Sarada growled, standing up abruptly, ending the conversation short. Sarada was beginning to shut down, falling deep into the insults her mind was whispering to her. _It's becoming more and more frequent now, huh? What a pity,_ Sarada thought.

And that leaves off to where Sarada was now, still pacing, unable to stop the current of insults her mind was throwing at her. She even began to see some patterns.

 _You bitch,_ the voice started, even though Sarada still didn't know what that word meant. _Why would they even want to listen to you? You're a disgrace. 'Sensitive' you say? You disgust me._

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Sarada shrieked, clutching her head in her hands, wanting desperately for her mind to stop. To stop before she started to believe each word. Silence suddenly echoed throughout the house, and thankfully, throughout Sarada's mind as well.

That is, until she heard intense whispering from downstairs.

And a knock at her window.

She whipped her head around so quick, it took her a couple minutes to regain her balance. When she finally contained her dizziness, Sarada looked up to see Boruto with a scared look on his face. Sarada screamed.

"Shhhh!" She could faintly hear Boruto's voice, making her heart spin in circles, and blood to rush up to her cheeks. She nodded, and walked over to window, tiptoeing. She didn't want to make any more noise than she already had.

She unlocked the latch and, with Boruto's help, lifted the window all the way to the top. She motioned for him to come in, causing him to blush and nod shyly. He hopped inside.

"Sarada, is everything okay up there? Did we do something to upset you?" Sakura's worried voice traveled from downstairs and the two kids froze with the fear of getting caught. Sarada knew her dad would kill both her and Boruto if he knew she had a boy in her room.

"Y-yes, of course, everything's fine!" She yelled back, hoping her response was convincing enough. She sighed in relief as the whispers from downstairs started up again. "What do you want?" Sarada hissed, turning to glare at Boruto, arms crossed.

"Sarada.. I-um.. What I said yesterday.. What I actually meant was..." Boruto stuttered, staring down at his shuffling feet. He got annoyed at his own hesitance, causing him to burst. "Fuck!" He yelled, stamping his foot, before covering his mouth, realizing what he had just done. "Ah, fuck it, I don't care, okay," he started again, Sarada staring at him with absolute disbelief written all over her face.

Even the hurried footsteps up the stairs didn't stop Boruto from talking this time.

"What I'm trying to say is that I.. guess I just um.. really like you? "

"Sarada, who's in there with you?" Sasuke growled, pounding on the door, seething.

"Sasuke, it's probably nothing, come on, let's go to bed.." Sakura joined in, ignoring her curiosity as to who actually was in there with her daughter. It had sounded like a boy's voice..

"N-nobody's in here with me, Papa, it's just.. I'm trying to get more intimidating and less sensitive by lowering my voice and saying words Mama says!" Sarada called out, her heart pounding against her chest with such momentum she thought her chest would burst open. She didn't know when she had become such a good liar. Survival instinct?

"What?! I don't say such things!" Sakura roared, Sasuke now the one trying to calm down the other. As her parents were distracted, she quickly flung Boruto in her closet and unlocked the door slowly, opening it with a cringe-worthy creak.

"See? Nobody's here?" Sarada tried to sound convincing, but her last statement sounded more like a question than anything else. Sasuke and Sakura peeked inside, Sasuke scoffing in frustration, and Sakura scoffing in disappointment. Sasuke left quickly, forgetting in his anger that he could have easily found someone by checking the room for chakra. Sakura followed suit, giving a quick look of disappointment at Sarada's room before heading down the steps leading downstairs. She had really wanted to see if Sarada had had a boy in her room so she could be a witness to her husband's protectiveness. It had been a while since she had seen such a thing.

Sarada sighed heavily, relief washing over her before she shut her door softly and locked it again. She tiptoed over to her closet and looked inside to see Boruto sniffing one of her favorite dresses.

"PERVERT!" Sarada whisper-yelled, snatching the dress away from a very embarrassed Boruto and throwing it on her bed. "Oh, shannaro, you may be a pervert, but I like you too, you sick.. bitch!" Boruto stared up at Sarada in shock.

"Did you just call me a bitch?"

"No! Yes! I don't know!" The blushing girl whispered, throwing her hands up in the air before marching over to her bed and sitting down next to the dress. She held her face in her hands as Boruto started laughing nervously. He got up and sat next to her, practically skipping the way there.

"So, what now?" Boruto whispered, grinning, gently removing Sarada's hands from her face so that she would see how happy he was. She obliged.

"Can we keep it a secret for now? I really don't want my dad to kill you.." Sarada admitted, her face an apple red as she grinned back. Her heart was floating on Cloud 9. They stared at each other for a while, both wondering how the other could like them. Their breaths mixed together once more, faces both as heated as a sauna.

"Sure," Boruto murmured, extending his arm across Sarada's shoulders and pulling her close. She relished in the body warmth and the feeling of true love. But something was bothering her. As she stared out the window with Boruto, shoulder pressed against shoulder, she wondered why she felt so empty inside.

That's when the voice whispered in her ear,

 _He's just like the others, Sarada. Don't trust him._


	7. Author's Note

**Hey, I'm sorry I forgot to add the disclaimer on my last chapter and some notes, so I'm just gonna post them here.**

 **Disclaimer: OBVIOUSLY, I don't own Naruto or any of the characters.**

 **Notes: Hey, so what do you guys think of the story so far? Do you think I should continue this way? I'd love to hear any suggestions or criticism! Thank you!**

 **I'll update another chapter either today or tomorrow, so stay tuned!**


	8. Black Hole

**Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN NARUTO OKAY? GOSH. (I'm kidding)**

 **Notes: Hey guys, I just want to let you know that Sasuke will be more serious (especially after crying like that in front of his wife-ouch!) and more like he should be! Thank you for helping me improve the story! Also, Shino's actions may seem OOC but he's actually just using whatever methods he can to get her to spill. As you can probably tell if you are this far in the story, all the boys in this fic do not have the best way of going about things. Also, stay tuned for great old uncle Naruto, I'll add him in..sometime.. mwahahahahaha...**

Sarada searched and searched but came up with nothing. The library still had one more section on mental health, and she was really hoping there was at least one book on depression.

She sighed, roaming through the last section carefully. She was smart enough to know that titles could be deceiving and not all of them had the title "Depression" on it. Luckily, her cautiousness came in handy. She found 3 books, all on "clinical depression", according to one book's title.

She sat down at the table farthest from other people and began to read. She didn't want anyone she knew finding her reading about depression. They might connect the dots and make fun of her. Or worse, pity her.

Just the thought made her hide her face behind the current book she was reading, called "Why Am I So Numb?" Based on these titles, Sarada felt like she wouldn't get much information on her father's "condition" that may or may not have been passed down to her. Thanks dad. Then again, Sarada should never judge a book by its cover.

She read the chapter titles quickly so that she could determine which section would hold the most beneficial information for her. As she read, she couldn't help but have the feeling that she was being watched- she looked up, down, all around, but nobody was around to stare at her. Sarada tried to shake it off, but the feeling never went away.

 _You're going cra~zy.._ her mind whispered, and Sarada could imagine a cruel face grinning sinisterly at her. She internally slapped the grin off that face, and began to laugh to herself, before realizing she was in public, and stopped.

 _Okay, focus,_ she thought to herself before indulging into each book separately. By the time she had finished with all three books, it was the afternoon. Today, school had been canceled due to a "bomb threat" that was being investigated thoroughly. To be completely honest, Sarada was grateful for such a thing. She really didn't feel like faking strength today. Or any day, for that matter.

The information she had gotten was tremendous, definitely a lot more than what she had previously known. She felt like she understood her father so much more, as well as herself. She now knew that the "voice" was her self esteem at the moment, which was close to non-existent. She learned that her getting more scared was not just her imagination. This depression was also the cause. She learned that her not concentrating in class and not caring about her homework and feeling empty inside-they were all symptoms of one thing. Most surprisingly, she learned that there did not need to be a traumatic event to cause depression. _But how could that be?_ She wondered to herself. _How could one measly thing cause so much damage? How could a decrease in serotonin cause so much distress?_

Sarada knew that self-diagnosing was wrong-but she couldn't take back the information she just attained. She couldn't take back the fact that all she had been feeling lately had been explained by these three books. That is, except for the crow incident and the heaviness in her head whenever a "episode of depression" passed over her like thunderclouds passing over the sky.

Maybe she would find that later on. For now, her eyes were watering from the strain of reading for so long and processing so much information. She decided that she had better quit for the day and walk back home. However, her stomach churned just of the thought of seeing her parents. She really didn't want to face them either, especially after keeping so many secrets from them. What if she broke? What if she told them everything? Sarada couldn't help but think they would hate her forever. But that was just a risk she was going to have to take.

Sarada stood from her table, passing by, she noted embarrassedly, her teacher, Shino. She began to walk faster, hoping she would reach the exit in time...

"Sarada, wait." Dammit! Not again! She continued to walk on, ignoring her sensei. She only stopped when he grabbed her shoulder, forcing her to turn around and look at him. She was shocked by what she saw. Her teacher without his sunglasses, and his eyes with dark circles underneath them. His eyes pleaded with her. She relented, reluctantly.

"Yes, sensei?" She tried to smile, she really did, but it looked more like she was constipated than anything else. Shino sighed, grabbing both her shoulders and shook her a little. It scared her.

"Why were you reading books on clinical depression?" Sarada's blood froze over. This time, she really hadn't been imagining someone watching her. Was she paranoid or was she sane? She didn't know anymore.

"I-I-" Sarada glanced everywhere but her sensei's face, trying to find something to help her lie before Shino found out what she was doing.

"And don't you dare lie to me!" Shino exclaimed, reading her mind, hands shaking on her shoulders, his face pale. What was with him? Why did he seem so...sick all of a sudden?

"My father," she started, internally gasping in relief when she wasn't interrupted again, "he told me about the effects of the Massacre and how they took its toll on him. I wanted to-to understand him more.." Shino looked disappointed at her answer, taking a step back. Sarada quickly backed away a couple steps, hands clutching her shoulders, eyebrows raised. "You want to tell me what that was about now?"

"...No, not really." Sarada's eyebrows raised even further, not expecting that answer. Then again, it was _Shino_.

"Oh. Okay." Sarada turned to leave.

"..If you ever want to learn about true art, see me after class," Shino replied, mysteriously. Sarada rolled her eyes, thinking about how she would never take him up on that offer, when her sensei gently placed his hands over his eyes and bugs started to crawl down his sleeves. Wait, what? Sarada did a double take as the last of the bugs crawled down his covered arms. Shino uncovered his eyes and to her surprise, the dark circles under his eyes were gone.

 _You stupid girl,_ the voice complained, _how could you not have known!?_

Sensei had been faking his urgency the entire time. But why? What was the purpose of that? Was he expecting another answer? Did he know the truth? She pondered each question carefully as she walked back to her house.

The voice didn't stop there, though. It kept repeating in her head, over and over, how stupid, pathetic, she was. How everyone played her like a pawn in chess because she was so fucking _easy_. Her fists clenched, her heart squeezing painfully in her chest. Fucking voices. At that moment, she truly began to question her sanity. She wasn't exactly _hearing voices_ , but it felt like this voice was a different person, a foreign voice than her own.

Maybe she was crazy.

No, no way, she was a victim, a victim, a victim-

 _Monster._

VICTIM! There's a difference!

 _MONSTER._

 _Nobody cares about you._

 _Nobody loves you._

 _They're all against you._

 _You bitch, shannaro._

When Sarada finally got home, she had bitten her tongue so hard that blood dribbled from her lips. She welcomed the pain. There was a comforting, relieving feeling to it, giving herself pain. After all, doesn't she deserve it?

The understatement of the year: Dinner was awkward. Sasuke was peering into her soul with his calculating eyes and Sakura was so cheerful, she couldn't help but stab the chopsticks into the plate each time her mother giggled, catching Sasuke's attention in the first place. What a mess.

 _A mess that's your fault_ , her mind joined in. Sarada no longer fought the voice. After all, what was the point? It would win anyway. This was bigger than her now. Completely beyond her control.

Sarada slipped upstairs after dumping all the excess food in the trash when she thought nobody was looking. Sakura had frowned, asked her, "Is my cooking really that bad?" Then, Sarada had turned, startled at that statement. She had been caught in the act, a deer trapped in the headlights.

"No, no, Mama, your cooking is _amazing_ , you know that. I just wasn't that hungry today." Sakura nodded, accepting her response.

"Okay, just make sure you eat more tomorrow. I'll even make your favorite!" Sarada smiled and widened her eyes, pretending to be interested. She just felt so.. exhausted tonight. Hopefully a good's night of sleep would change that. Sasuke had narrowed his eyes, suspicious, but letting it go.

Sarada shut her bedroom door once more and collapsed onto her bed. She didn't want to go to school tomorrow, she felt that it would be too much for her to face in one day. And for that, she felt pathetic.

As hours ticked by, and Sarada's eyes never closed, this day, May 31st, became the first ever day where Sarada gave into her own depression that had begun to take form. The first day she had willingly pushed aside her homework even though she had the chance to finish it, and the first day she had ever not completely eaten sushi, her second favorite food. The first day her insomnia began.

Sarada was spiraling down into a black hole and she didn't even know it.


	9. Fingers

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Unfortunately.**

 **Notes: Sorry it wasn't that good this time, my heart wasn't into it because I have lots of homework. I hope you enjoy it anyways!'**

Sarada awoke to-no way- _another_ nightmare. Heavy breathing, widened, fearful eyes, a racing heart, and shaking hands. Dammit. Not again. It was becoming a pattern now. It wasn't like she was watching horror movies every night.

She glanced at her calendar tiredly, rubbing her eyes as she calmed herself down. One more day until the teams were assigned. She was surprised at her excitement for the event, and couldn't help but feel today would be a better day than yesterday. Boy, she hoped she was right.

She got dressed, brushed her teeth, her hair, and ate breakfast. Interestingly, Sasuke did not show up for breakfast. She wondered where he had gone. A rush on anxiety struck her, filling her thoughts with images of her father's turned back and a sobbing daughter. She quickly shook her head, reassuring herself that Sakura wouldn't be so chipper if he had left.

As she headed off to school, Sarada heard a crow caw above her. Her head flinched upwards to see a crow at her bedroom window. She shivered, backing away slowly before full out running from her fears. She ran, ran, ran until she could run no more, and by that time she had reached the Academy. To her displeasure, she saw the brunette throw a glare at her as she sat down at her seat. Great. She was back. This day couldn't have gotten off to a better start.

Sarada hurried to her seat, planning on avoiding that girl for the entire day. Somehow. She hoped that the brunette wouldn't seek her out. Then she'd be screwed. She took out her homework-only to see its blank pages. Shit. She forgot all about that stupid decision. She shrugged it off, taking out her pencil case and began to copy down the answers, more half-assed than anything. She stopped, realizing that it was a study guide and was based on questions she already knew the answers to. She breathed a sigh of relief, putting her pencil down and leaning back in her seat, closing her eyes. Of course it would be a study guide, the team assignments were tomorrow. This was all a preparation for the rumored "bell test". She knew that everybody probably knew about it by now, even though they weren't supposed to, meaning their parents probably told them. That is, assuming everyone's parents had been ninjas.

Shino entered the classroom and everyone fell silent. Sarada shivered, absentmindedly touching her shoulders, remembering their last encounter. He had her completely and utterly confused as hell. Luckily, no secret glances were sent her way and she relaxed a bit. Maybe it had been a mistake, a dream, a hallucination, anything other than reality.

She did receive a wink from Boruto though, when he noticed her staring at him. She blushed, thinking that maybe he already knew about her stalker issue and didn't mind.

 _Thought no person ever,_ the voice chimed, sounding extremely gleeful about destroying Sarada's hopes and dreams. _You're weird as fuck, admit it._

Sarada ignored the voice and tried to focus.

"As you may already know, tomorrow your teams will be assigned, so your test will be today. Let's hope all of you did your study guides," he gives a look specifically to Boruto, making him scowl and cross his arms in his seat. Sarada felt dread as the brunette volunteered to pass out the tests. She checked her pulse, feeling nauseous and dizzy at the same time.

 _It's just your worst nightmare. What could go wrong?_ The voice whispered sarcastically. Again, Sarada ignored it, her tolerance starting to dwindle. She clenched her teeth and bit her scarred tongue, relying on old tactics.

The bully practically threw the test at her, and Sarada watched as it floated to the floor, slowly. She looked up at the brunette expectantly. Said girl just smirked and crossed her arms, waiting. Sarada narrowed her eyes, leaning down and grabbing the paper herself, falling for the bait.

An excruciating pain traveled from her hand to her brain. Sarada let out a scream of agony as her hand was strangled by the bully's pink, sparkling shoe. Heads spun and mixed reactions spread throughout the classroom. Some laughed, and some gasped in shock. Some were angry, like the mysterious, pale boy by the window and some were infuriated like Boruto was.

Sarada death glared the girl as she laughed, releasing her hand finally after what felt like forever. The raven quickly cradled it, the fingers already swelling and the back of her hand already turning black and blue. She heard Shino call out to her distantly, but all the blood rushing to her head left her unable to respond. Her ears were ringing and all she felt was hatred for this girl as she turned her back- _don't you are turn your back on me, bitch_ \- on her and walked away.

 _What, you aren't going to do anything about that? Pathetic. Can't even stand up for yourself._

Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Sarada's heart beat steadily like a drum and she could feel it pulse in her neck because it was so strong.

Sarada didn't even realize she was being surrounded until someone put their hand on her shoulder, making her flinch and let out a tiny squeal. Boruto jumped back, looking at her through furious, sad eyes. A pale boy to her right she didn't recognize was staring at her with concern and the teacher was to her left, trying to get a closer look at her swollen hand.

Her lip trembled as the anger and hurt transformed into guilt. She wouldn't have even gotten into this mess if she hadn't _broken the other girl's nose_.

Shino had gotten a pretty good look of the banged up hand, deciding it was bad enough to punish the other girl by. He marched over and grabbed the girl's arm, dragging her out of the classroom. The class went wild without supervision. Boys started screaming, girls formed clique circles of death, and then there were the ones who started fighting and pulling pranks on each other. Someone barricaded the door and another wrote "fuck you sensei" on the board behind the teacher's desk. The teacher's desk, on the other hand, was being invaded by nosy tweens.

"Sarada, are you okay?" The pale boy asked cautiously, kneeling down to her level. He felt strangely like a caring older brother figure to her. Sarada nodded, pulling her bruised hand to her chest, thinking the act was a lie.

 _That's right, Sarada. He and Boruto are working together and they want to hurt you more than that girl ever could._

"Really, I am," Sarada reassured, but Boruto dramatically raised an eyebrow in question and the other boy scoffed in disagreement. She wished the two of them would just leave her alone. She didn't need this. She didn't need anyone. What if Boruto really did want to hurt her? What if all he said that night was a lie?

That's when Shino decided to break the barricade down, using his bugs. He stood angrily at the entrance, silently demanding who had done such a thing. Silence fell across the classroom. After a few moments of silence, he rushed over to Sarada, carrying bandages. "Here, these will help," Shino murmured as Sarada used her left hand-using her right hand when she grabbed the paper-to grab the bandages from Shino's hand and gently wrap them around her hand. She sighed, surprised that she hadn't cried this entire time. Instead she felt empty, numb. She felt like her insides had been hollowed out and that there was nothing left. Fright overtook her senses at the realization.

"S-sensei, can I go to the bathroom?" Shino nodded solemnly and Mitsuki and Boruto watched her go, wishing they could help their friend in some way. Of course, Mitsuki technically wasn't a friend of hers yet, but he was getting there, starting today. Orochimaru had told him all about the wonders of the Uchihas, and Mitsuki couldn't help but long for a friendship with one.

After she had walked back to the classroom, Sarada had quickly done her shadow clone jutsu, despite her pain. She had been excused from sparring practice and had silently read a book. The teacher warily sent the kids off with a "we'll see who passes," and a wave.

Sarada didn't feel like explaining her wound. She knew her mother would be upset, but she was beginning to doubt her father's love again. She didn't know how he would react. As many times as she tried to reassure herself that he loved her, the little seed of doubt had already been planted. There was no convincing herself otherwise now.

As expected, Sakura had yelled for Sasuke and re-bandaged her wound upon seeing it, and demanded answers that Sarada had quickly given. Sasuke had hummed, and watched his wife bandage her hand. He waited quietly for his wife to fill him in on what had happened.

As it turned out, Sarada had skipped dinner due to the pain of lifting her utensils. Sakura had offered to feed her, but Sarada had quickly shook her head in response, blushing fervently. The raven trudged up the steps, the simple task feeling abnormally more difficult than usual. Boruto had knocked at her window again, but Sarada ignored him until he gave up in frustration.

Again, her eyes did not close. Sarada stared at the ceiling, thinking about every mistake that she had made in her lifetime and how that made her an unlovable, bad person. She lay still as silent tears made their way down her face.

The voice was winning. And this was only the beginning.


	10. Goodbyes

**Disclaimer: No Naruto me ownage. Probably for the best.**

 **Notes: Hey guys, if you want to give me ideas on what you want to see happen, feel free to message me! Enjoy!**

"Sarada Uchiha!" Sarada marched confidently to the center of the classroom, being sure not to look anywhere but her sensei to show her superiority over all the other kids. Which, of course, was only needed to make up for Sarada's own new inferiority complex. It practically appeared over night, but how could so much confidence be torn down in just hours? No, maybe it had started with that bully..The first time she had ever called herself a monster..

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Sarada called out, swiftly weaving hand signals with her hands. She winced a bit as her right fingers twisted, but she had decided beforehand that she would rather be faster and in pain than slower and still in pain.

Around her, 4 clones appeared, making 5 versions of herself visible. The class remained quiet at her achievement, as expected, but disappointing her at the same time. The teacher slowly handed her official ninja headband to her. _Finally_ , she thought, _finally I'm one step closer to being the Hokage._ To her relief, excitement still came to her every time she thought of her ultimate dream. Not everything had been taken away...yet.

Hours before, Sarada had been greeted awake by both of her parents, each wearing a smile on their face to encourage her with. They had made her bento in a special way and created the foreign dish of pancakes for breakfast, Sarada's personal favorite breakfast food. She had gone off with a serene smile on her face that remained undisturbed until she entered the Academy's doors. The events yesterday at the Academy had hardened Sarada, readied and numbed her unconsciously every time she walked through those two front doors.

And so Sarada was ready when she had finally been called to action. She had been absolutely _born_ for this. But after it had happened, after she had gotten her headband, after all the excitement was over, Sarada couldn't help but feel low and disappointed at the lack of feeling of accomplishment. She felt that something should have changed, something big should have happened, appeared in her own emotions. _So that's it?_ She thought. _That's all my dream is worth?_

Boruto approached her, congratulating her and showing off his own headband. They exchanged insults, their heated display filled with giggles and over exaggerated winks, quickly cheering Sarada up. Mitsuki smirked, thinking Boruto must have finally made his move on her. He strut over like the fabulous person he was. Both ninjas didn't notice him until he stretched a hand in between their faces.

"You guys are really into each other, huh?" Immediately, denials were thrown and faces were heated a deep red. Mitsuki simply smiled, as the denials-turned-insults fell on deaf ears.

Sarada couldn't believe this boy was so perceptive, they weren't being obvious at all! Right? Upon seeing Boruto's flushed face, Sarada quickly changed her mind, becoming silent in embarrassment. Her heart beat strongly in her chest, full of life and happiness, and Sarada took the moment to relish such blessings. By the time she came to her senses, both boys were looking at her questioningly. Suddenly, Sarada hatched an idea at the sight, remembering how she herself had been just as confused by Aburame-sensei.

"Guys, you want to see some true art?" Sarada smirked mischievously. Boruto nodded fervently, ignorantly, and Mitsuki's eyes gleamed with interest. She walked calmly over to her sensei, hearing the two boys' footsteps following behind her. "Sensei, I'm ready to see some true art now." Shino nodded, glancing behind her.

"Are they coming too?" Sarada nodded, causing Shino to nod again in acceptance and lead the way back into the forest behind the Academy. The trio focused on their teacher's back, as they had already seen the sights that the forest had to offer a while back. Sarada had explored these woods once herself and had gotten lost, worrying her parents sick. It was still a calming experience to her, as it was one of the strongest memories in which both of her parents showed their love for her.

The trio jumped over trunks and roots, determined to make the trip as fun as possible, especially after just getting their ninja headbands. They laughed and played with the trees, the Aburame leader rolling his eyes, smiling under his mask. The greenery only seemed to brighten Sarada's view of the world, giggling as Mitsuki swung from one tree to another.

Without a sound, their teacher had stopped walking, and Boruto bumped into his back, immediately jumping back and apologizing. Unlike Naruto at his age, he still had respect for his teachers.

Sarada stopped murmuring an old lullaby her mother used to sing to her under her breath and looked around the clearing. She hadn't been _here_ before. Evidently, the two other boys hadn't either, as "oohs" and ahhs" escaped from their lips as their heads swiveled like chairs.

Shino turned around to face his students and waited until he had their undivided attention. He slowly raised his arms till they were level with his shoulders and stilled. Then, something extraordinary happened. Bugs started to appear, crawling from his sleeves and onto his hands until they covered every inch of his skin. Then, they began to dance, their teacher dancing with them. At first, Sarada laughed at the idiocy of it all, but soon she became mesmerized by its beauty and artistic creativity. Each move was unique and graceful ,and carefully planned out. Sarada began to appreciate what her sensei had done, and realized it was his way of asking her if she was okay.

At long last, she had figured it out. Took her long enough, but she did it in the end. She had figured out the reason for his act and this opportunity. Of course her sensei, of all people, would notice her inner plight, and she felt grateful that he was willing to help her. Her heart burst with delight, and she abruptly got up and began to clap, hoping that her teacher was getting her message.

Shino smiled, giving her a nod to let her know that he understood. After a couple more minutes of awed silence and beautiful dancing, Shino bowed, the bugs bowing with him and slowly receding back down his sleeves. Boruto, Mitsuki, and Sarada all clapped loudly, whooping and cheering for their leader.

 _I'm okay, sensei,_ Sarada thought with all her strength as she tried to psychically put her thoughts into her sensei's head, not seeing the nod, thinking that her teacher still had not gotten her message.

They headed back, Sarada bummed, thinking she had not achieved her goal, Boruto laughing with joy, and Mitsuki clapping along to the beat of nature. Shino led the way back with a pleased aura surrounding him. He had done all he could, and succeeded in his goal, which was making his best student happy. After all, it was their second-to-last day together, tomorrow only lasting for a couple hours as he announced the teams and told them their meeting places with their new sensei. He could only hope for the best and wish his students good luck, keeping them in mind as he got to know his next batch of children with eager eyes and innocent minds.

Parting was a solemn event, but at the same time, it happily welcomed the new. Sarada stayed behind as Boruto and Mitsuki headed towards the Uzumaki household, skipping as they went. Shino leaned down to her level, waiting for her to speak.

"I'm okay now. Than k you, sensei, for everything you have done for us-for me," Sarada mumbled, forcing herself not to cry. She had lost count of the amount of times she had cried this week only. The voice was about to jump in, steal away her newfound satisfaction, when Shino sighed contently. Sarada looked up, not even realizing that her head had drooped until now, meeting her sensei's gaze.

"I'm glad. I know you will become a fine ninja and wish you the best. I am always here if you need anything." Shino didn't know what it was like not to have a father in his life, but he knew that without his father at her age, he would have been very far away from the person he had wanted to become. His heart went out to her. He knew that she needed someone as a father figure, and as a teacher, it was his natural duty to become a role model for every child he taught.

"I will," Sarada replied, voice louder than before. She nodded a goodbye to her sensei before taking off towards her house. Tomorrow she would get her team assignments. Tonight, she would celebrate her new rank with her parents.

She genuinely smiled for the first time in what felt like forever. However, it didn't last long.

"TAKE THIS!" Sarada's sharingan activated, she turned just in time to see the brunette from her class try to punch her, aiming for her nose. _An eye for an eye, huh?_ Sarada thought bitterly. She jumped out of the way, causing the bully to stumble and take a few seconds to regain her balance. She smirked at Sarada. "I thought we might as well finish this tonight. What do you say, you bitch?"

"What the hell does that even mean?!" Sarada yelled, frustrated that this girl just had to ruin her night. _Mama, Papa, I'm sorry,_ Sarada sent a silent prayer, _it's going to take a little longer for me to get home than usual._

 _Let's kick some ungrateful ass,_ the voice whispered, hatred dripping from each word.


	11. Bonds

**Disclaimer: No me own Naruto.**

 **Notes: Most of the plot was the idea of FailingErin, please check her out, she's an amazing person. This is for her!**!

"Where _is_ she?!" Sakura was absolutely _livid_. The Academy had ended an hour ago, and yet her precious daughter was still not home. As Sakura paced about the walkway, Sasuke sighed, finishing the last of his food as he sat at the kitchen table. _That does it_ , he thought.

"I'm going to go look for her," Sasuke stated in complete monotone, yet Sakura could hear the irritation in his voice. Years of marriage had taught her how to decipher her husband. Sakura whipped her head towards him, not hearing him right in her panic.

"You're going to cook? Since when do you cook?" Sakura snapped, and continued her stress march. Every second that ticked by only worried her even more. Her hair stuck to her face and neck with sweat and her forehead displayed worry lines. Obviously, Sakura was not in the best mood. "And besides, we already ate-"

"Look. I said look for her. Our daughter." Sasuke got up from his chair, reaching for his wife to try and calm her down. Sakura's eyes softened at the gesture. She wrapped herself up in his arms, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes in contentment. Sasuke placed his head upon his wife's own head and explained to her, "Sarada is going to be fine. I'll find her, okay?"

Sakura nodded, calming down. She smiled nervously, "Find our baby, Sasuke. You have to." Sasuke nodded and set off with determined and confident steps. As he stepped out the door, he inwardly prayed that Sarada was okay. She was his world, she and Sakura. His two wonderful young women. He would protect them-no matter what it took.

 _Please, Sarada. Please be okay._

Sarada lunged at the girl who dared to challenge her. In her weakened state, the bloody and bruised raven missed, the brunette barely being able to move out of the way. Both girls began to pant and tremble, fatigue winning them over. They glared at each other with the utmost intensity.

"It means," the brunette coughed, blood dripping from her wounded lip, "that you're a terrible person." Sarada furrowed her eyebrows as beads of sweat dripped past them. She winced as the action irritated her scratched forehead.

"What?" Sarada had no idea what this girl was going on about. All she could focus on now was winning this damn fight. She had no idea how much time had passed, but she did know that she had to get home quick, otherwise her mom would be pissed. The only way to end this quick, however, was to make the first move. She waited for a response, planning her attack.

"You asked what 'bitch' meant," the girl stated softly, gently, as if Sarada might break if she spoke too angrily. This, of course, pissed Sarada off. _I'm not the one you should be worried about_! Sarada exclaimed silently in her mind. Outwardly, she took an attacking stance and huffed in pain before taking off to the brunette's left side.

"I'm not a terrible person!" Sarada screeched, weaving signs with her hands to create the Shadow Clone Jutsu. The voice screamed with her.

 _You are such a terrible person! It's about time somebody recognized that!_

The brunette tiredly straightened, turning to her left and revealing her teeth with a snarl. The both of them had been reduced to absolute animals. Sarada raised her knee, kneeing the other in the stomach, causing the brunette to yell in surprise like she had been shot. In retaliation, the brunette grabbed a bunch of Sarada's hair and pulled as hard as she could. Sarada's resounding scream sounded like she had been gutted.

"You don't know me," the brunette snarled, feeling the bliss of control as she yanked and yanked at Sarada's head, "you don't know my life!" Sarada looked up, her Sharingan looking much scarier up close and stopping the brunette in her tracks. The raven took the opportunity to slash the girl's left cheek with her nails and spring free, luckily, with her hair still intact.

"You're telling me! You don't know me either! You don't know what I've been through!" Sarada rasped, collapsing to the ground. The brunette advanced, a glint of glee in her eyes as she stalked towards the defeated raven. Sarada felt ashamed of herself. Was this all she had? She had been defeated by this weakling? She would never be Hokage at this rate.

Abruptly, the brunette tripped, face crashing to the dirt. Sarada laughed at her, almost hysterical from the raw savagery of the ongoing battle. However, her blood ran cold at the sight of a malicious smile and the glint of a piece of glass that the brunette had found on the ground. Panic tore through her nerves as the girl inched closer and closer, babbling as she did.

"My family hates me! I have to do everything myself if I ever want to get anything done! My brother and my mother beat me, my father ignores me, I'm all alone! How could you ever understand the pain of an abandoned child?! You've been loved from the very minute you were born!" The brunette loomed above her now, her knees digging into the ground, both arms above her head as she held the jagged piece of glass above Sarada's own head. Despite her fear, Sarada glared defiantly into the brunette's eyes.

"You're wrong," Sarada deadpanned, watching as the brunette's face twisted with rage at the statement. "I was abandoned when I was born. A lost cause to my own fucking father. My mother pities me. I'm all by myself." Sarada shocked herself at the complete and utter loneliness in her words. She shocked herself as she uttered the complete and utter truth.

"You liar!" The girl hissed, and Sarada shut her eyes tight as she felt the glass descend upon her. She was at the complete mercy of her enemy now. A feminine cry of surprise resounded in Sarada's ears and she opened her eyes warily. The brunette stood, frozen, eyes wide in shock, arms shaking above her head. There was a familiar kunai at her throat and a deep, masculine growl of fury.

"Don't you _ever_ go near my daughter ever again." The brunette nodded, gulping with terror. As soon as Sasuke released the girl from his menacing grip, she ran like the devil was after her, soon becoming a tiny bloodied brown dot in the distance. Sasuke turned his wrathful gaze onto his fatigued daughter. He leaned down to her level, Sharingan glaring right into her own. "And you.. Engaging in physical violence like this.. What is the meaning of such behavior?"

Sarada looked determinedly to the dirt beneath her, shame burning her cheeks. _What is the meaning of such behavior, Sarada?_ The voice mocked. _Why are you acting like such a.._

"Papa, I... It's-I...You..You just wouldn't understand," Sarada stutters pathetically. She feels tears prickle her eyes and exhaustion licking at her consciousness. She just wants to go home. Sarada makes an attempt to get up, but fails, falling back to the ground with a messy thud. She barks a half-laugh half -sob out of her throat, not daring to look up at her father. He must be thinking about how stupid she looks in the dirt, a push away from crying her eyes out.

 _He must be thinking about how worthless you are,_ the voice hissed as she fell down, down, down the rabbit hole, _He must be thinking about how much he regrets having you. How much he wanted a son because you tarnished the word 'daughter' for him!_

"Sarada," Sasuke sighed, his eyes fluttering close as he tried to calm down, "talk to me." When he opened his eyes, his Sharingan was gone. He had lent his listening ear to her, and waited for her to grasp onto it. She refused.

"No, Papa, just leave me alone. Leave me here to _die_ ," His daughter whispered, making his blood run cold. Sasuke grabbed his daughter's hand and gently lifted her to her feet. Sarada avoided his pleading gaze at all costs, tears leaking down her cheeks, silently begging for the warmth and love that she thought Sasuke did not have. He had gotten a hold of his emotions from their last dramatic encounter. He did not flinch, did not cry at the sight of her tears and broken appearance. He simply let go of her hand and began to drift towards their house. After a few seconds of walking, he turned back around, waiting for her.

"Aren't you coming?" Sasuke inquired softly, in the same way the brunette had which hardened Sarada's resolve to keep quiet. She nodded, following behind him, head down like a whimpering dog following its owner. Her fingers clenched themselves into fists as she punctured her nails into her palms, trying to keep the tears at bay.

At first, both were silent, walking along the path and gathering up their thoughts. Sasuke was thinking of ways to approach his daughter, Sarada thinking up ways to redeem herself to her father.

 _You'll never be redeemed in his eyes,_ Sarada, the voice cackled like a madman, _not when you are already nothing to him. You always will be nothing. Just like you said, he abandoned you at birth. He doesn't want you, Sarada. He hates you!_

"Sarada," Sasuke started, snapping Sarada right out of her depressing thoughts. She looked up for the first time, but quickly looked away upon realizing that Sasuke was staring her down from over his shoulder. "You mother and I were worried sick about you, and we still are," Her father murmured, and Sarada inwardly noted to herself that he didn't really meant 'we' but rather 'she', "Don't you think that you should explain yourself to make us feel a bit better?"

 _Yes, Sarada, don't you want your parents to feel better? Are you such a burden that you can't even make them happy for once in their lives?_

"Sorry that I can't even make you happy," Sarada grunted defensively, trying to hold all her broken pieces together like a wounded wolf. Sasuke frowned, playing back his own words in his head, trying to see what he had said wrong. He stopped walking, causing Sarada to bump into his back. She quickly jumped away, embarrassed at making such a amateur move. Sarada, relieved that Sasuke had stopped looking at her from over his shoulder, stared up at his tall back, fearful of his answer. What if he scolded her? Confessed his hate? Or worse, pitied her, just like her mother? He did none of the above.

"You make me happy every single day, Sarada. You make me happy just by showing me your beautiful smile. But I've noticed you've stopped smiling lately." Sasuke explained, hoping she would finally confess what was bothering her. Sarada gave a fake smile to his back before frowning even more deeply than before. "That wasn't a real smile, Sarada." Said girl widened her eyes in surprise, trying to see if there were hidden eyes in the back of his head, leaning from side to side.

Suddenly, Sasuke turned around and gave his daughter a soft, small smile. It was barely there, but it was genuine. She wondered how it could be so easy for him, the most socially awkward person she knew, and be so hard for her. Sarada finally decided that her games weren't getting her anywhere, and that it was about damn time she told her father the truth. She sighed, and that was Sasuke's warning to prepare himself for whatever was coming.

"I've stopped smiling because it isn't worth the effort," Sarada deadpanned, going straight to the point, not wanting to delay their journey home any longer. "Smiling is for people who see good in the world. What's the point of that?" Sasuke hummed at her response, resuming his slow pace once more, looking ahead. Sarada followed, embarrassed at her own words. They sounded a lot better in her head.

 _Who's the socially awkward one now?_ The voice howled so loudly that Sarada winced, shaking her head violently to clear it once and for all. It had gotten louder and louder. She wished it would stop talking for once.

"I think smiling is for those who _dream,"_ Sasuke mused, staring up the stars, his mundane eyes glowing in the light. Sarada looked,-really looked-at her father. She saw a majestic man who had achieved all he had wanted in his life. So then, why did he smile? Why did he smile if he had nothing left to dream about? "That includes you, Sarada. And your dream to be Hokage."

Sarada blushed, involuntarily smiling at the thought of her ridiculous dream. It felt so unachievable now. She hadn't realized she had smiled until Sasuke poked her forehead affectionately. She tried, she really did, to believe he loved her, but all she could feel was hatred coming off him in vibes. Or was that her own hatred for herself?

Sasuke reached back and grabbed her hand without looking back, holding it like it was his lifeline. They gazed at the stars together, home only a minute or two more away.

The girl hesitated in her belief , her delusion that Sasuke hated her, really feeling their connection, at least just for a minute. But maybe, just maybe, that was enough.

"What do you dream about, Papa?" Sarada asked, self consciously picking at her bandaged right hand with her fingers, her left hand still held captive by Sasuke's. Sasuke glanced back at her before answering, thinking her show of embarrassment was absolutely adorable, not that he would admit that out loud. He took a breath.

"I dream about your bright future, Sarada. I dream of our family's future and that we will all be safe, healthy, and happy. That is what I dream about," Sasuke smiled at the thought of his dream. He carefully chose each step up the steps leading to his house. "Well, here we are. You know you can talk to me anytime, right?" Sarada nodded. "Good."

Hands still clasped together, they walked up to the door of the Uchiha household. Sarada felt ready to face anything. That is, until the voice had to join in, ruining the moment.

 _Sarada, where have you seen that kunai before? Hmm? Isn't that Boruto's?_

 _Great. Thanks, voice,_ Sarada thought sarcastically. _Thanks for reminding me of how much more my father loves my boyfriend than me, his daughter._

Boyfriend. The word tasted funny in her mouth and made her giggle as Sasuke opened the door and they both stepped into the warm, artificial light.

Sarada loved her father very much. Her father loved Boruto more than he loved her, and even then Sasuke's love for her was close to nonexistent. _The voice is right_ , Sarada thought as a weight fell on her head, her eyes drooping with sadness, _I'll never be perfect in Papa's eyes. Ever._


	12. Cuts and Scars

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Em sorry.**

 **Notes: I realize I may have confused some of you, this is set JUST BEFORE the Boruto movie, in which Boruto also says he wants to protect her even before the scene in the movie. Sorry about the mix-up! Enjoy?!**

"Sarada! Oh, where the fuck have you been!?" Sakura rushed into view, immense relief evident in her features. She dragged Sarada into her arms, filling her with the warmth she was looking for.

 _Too bad mother dearest isn't on your side either._

They two of them relished in the sound of each other's heartbeat, forgetting about everything else just for a moment. However, as soon as that moment faded away, Sarada took a step backwards, loosening her mother's grip on her. Sakura looked up, opening her eyes, giving her a look of such hurt it killed Sarada on the inside. But she knew that Sakura couldn't love her if she pitied her. The two just didn't fit right together.

 _It's time to let go of your family, Sarada. They can't help you and you can't help them. This is for the best. Really._

"I'm sorry Mama, I got in a fight..Can I-" Before she could ask to go to her room, Sakura gasped, as if just seeing her daughter's appearance for the first time. She studied her from head to toe, horror growing each second she looked at her. She studied each bruise, each cut, each wound visible on her daughter's beaten body. She took in a slow breath of horror, her hand slapped across her mouth, her eyes wide open. Sasuke stood behind Sarada, watching the exchange with sad eyes.

"Sarada," Sakura asked carefully as if she was talking to a threatened animal (which may or may not be true at this point in time), "who did this to you?" Tears were demanding to be spilled again, but Sarada's pride had retaken its claim. Just the mention of the fight hit a sensitive spot inside her.

"I-I don't know her name, but she has brown hair," Sarada answered, feeling like she was failing her mother now too. The voice nodded with pride, glad Sarada was finally seeing her true monstrous form. Sakura sighed heavily, the panicked hand on her mouth moving to her forehead. She pulled Sarada back into a hug. This time, Sarada didn't pull away, too tired to rebel.

"Honey, why? You're the sweetest girl I've ever met. How could anyone ever hurt you like that?" Sarada had so many answers to that question, all answers she dared not say in fear of upsetting her mother.

 _I'm unlovable, that's why._

 _I'm a terrible person, a bitch, that's why._

 _I'm a nobody, Mama. I'm worthless._

Sarada stayed quiet.

Sakura led Sarada into the kitchen, where she left her to go get the first aid kit in her bathroom. Sarada awkwardly waited, Sasuke by her side, leaning on the same counter in which Sarada sat on. A moment later, Sakura ran back to her daughter, setting the first aid kit right next to her and opening it. She cleaned her wounded forehead, legs, arms, face, and head. Luckily, her stomach was the only part of her body that had not been scarred. Her vitals were left unharmed.

Sakura sighed in relief as she finished bandaging up the last wound. During the silence that had ensued while Sakura bandaged Sarada's wounds, Sarada had silently been thinking about how much of a burden she was, Sasuke had been worrying about his daughter and ways to protect her from that brunette, and Sakura had been thinking about what her daughter could possibly be hiding from her. She still hadn't come up with anything except that maybe Boruto had something to do with...something.

"There, that's better," Sakura breathed, patting her daughter's knee and helping her down from the counter. Sarada pecked her mother's cheek and headed upstairs, scratching at her bandaged scabs. Sakura watched her go with distant eyes and a hand on her hip. She turned to Sasuke for help.

"Why do you think this happened?" Sasuke turned his gaze form his departing daughter to his frustrated wife. He then turned away, pondering her question for a moment, before humming and shrugging his shoulders, feigning ignorance. Sakura huffed in indignation, muttering a "never mind" and stalking to their bedroom.

Meanwhile, Sarada was sitting on her bed, intently clutching Boruto's kunai. She had stolen it from her father's pocket when he hadn't been looking. She would have been proud of herself if she wasn't so down about the meaning of the kunai's original location. She had connected the dots. The morning he hadn't been there to send Sarada off, he was spending it with Boruto, training him. That was the only explanation. The voice laughed at her expense.

 _Your father abandoned you for the Hokage's child. Is it really that surprising? Obviously, the Hokage's kid is more suitable to his tastes than his loser, delinquent daughter._

Sarada's heart clenched, and she couldn't take the pain anymore. She needed something, anything to take the pain away. The voice silenced and observed her suffering as she rolled off the bed, hands desperately clutching at her chest, the kunai still in her hands, pointing up at her chin. It finally spoke up, taking pity.

 _That kunai in your hands can help you take away the pain, Sarada. You need to distract yourself with pain to cancel out the pain on the inside. Go on, Sarada. Do it._

Sarada paled at the notion. She had never heard of such a thing, but it made sense. However, injuring herself? She was getting her new team tomorrow and she was going to have to use her skills to defeat their new sensei. She would only pull her teammates behind if she hindered herself even more. But the pain in her chest refused to go away. Sarada had to do _something_. As the seconds ticked by, she became more and more desperate. She finally gave in, clenching her teeth as she sat up on the edge of her bed.

 _I'm really going to do this,_ Sarada thought to herself. She positioned the kunai just above the inside of her wrist, her hands shaking a tad. She slowly cut horizontally across her wrist, relishing in the immediate sting. She re-positioned and this time, she sliced quickly, muttering a silent "ow" under her breath. She grabbed a tissue and dabbed at the beads of blood slowly spilling from her open wounds. Sarada released the heavy sigh of relief she didn't realize she'd been holding and dropped the kunai, watching as it landed to the floor with a ting. She laid back and began to heal herself using techniques her mother had taught her the year before. When the cuts became nothing more than scars on her wrist, her eyes drooped and, for the first time in several days, she fell asleep.

When she finally awoke from her nightmare, Sarada sat up in her bed, gasping for breath. Her chest heaved steadily, quickly, up then down.

 _It was just a dream_ , she told herself, wiping her eyes and removing the yellow crust from them. She stared at her closet for a little more than usual. feeling the odd sensation that a dangerous shinobi was behind those white doors, waiting for her to turn her back on him.. Sarada shivered, moving her gaze to her calendar. Today was the day she would be assigned her team. She felt nothing. Tired. Numb.

Sarada stumbled out of bed, going to her bathroom and looking at the disgusting image in the mirror. She cringed, and glanced at her brush. She didn't feel like fixing her hair today. Nor did she feel like brushing her teeth. Something that had come so naturally to her before felt like such a chore. Where did it all go wrong?

The raven sighed, staring at the black circles under her image's eyes. She turned away, too ashamed of her appearance to look at it ever again. Maybe it was just a phase. Maybe she'd get over it soon.

The girl hopped down the steps lazily, abandoning her stealthy habit for no reason in particular. She just felt like it. That also seemed to be the excuse her mind gave her whenever she asked herself why she had ever accepted that fight with the brunette. Whenever she thought of her, she felt guilt and anger. Why hadn't she listened and believed her when she told that girl her own story? Was she so selfish to ignore Sarada's confession? But at the same time, why tell Sarada about her own messed up life? Wouldn't she be the last person she'd talk to about that? _So many questions left unanswered_ , Sarada mused as she landed on the last step.

Sakura, dear observant Sakura, noticed the two white marks on the inside of her daughter's wrist. She was reminded of some patients she had treated with scars on their wrists that they had done to themselves. She removed the thought from her head, because her happy, healthy daughter would never do something like that. "What are those from?" Sakura inquired subtly, pointing to her wrist. Sarada's eyes widened in panic and she felt blood rushing to her face.

"I-I don't know," Sarada stuttered, looking anywhere but her mother's eyes. Something was up, Sakura observed, but she didn't know what. She nodded at the reply, accepting it for now, and handed her daughter her bento. She turned to flip the eggs before turning back around to see Sarada nowhere in sight and the door open.

 _Not again,_ she thought. Sakura growled in irritation, throwing her spatula across the room in anger. She would have to confront Boruto later, ask him _what the hell he did to her daughter._


	13. Help

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Or Sarada. Or Sasuke. Or Sakura. Or Boruto. But I do own the shitty brunette!**

 **Notes: Nope. Nothing here. Enjoy!?**

"Sarada, Boruto, and Mitsuki, you three are a team," Shino announced. Sarada smiled shyly at Boruto and the mysterious pale boy next to him, her other teammate. She would have to get to know him more through the infamous Uchiha Interrogation.

As their sensei finished announcing the teams, Boruto and Mitsuki rushed over to Sarada's table, frowning as they saw her injuries. "What happened?" Mitsuki asked suspiciously. Sarada laughed nervously under the pressure, eyes flickering between the two boys.

"I got into a fight," Sarada laughed, grinning with fake pride. She didn't know when she had gone to the new low of faking emotions in front of her friends. Then again, she was reaching new all time lows every day now. Boruto grinned with her, believing the lie and pumping his first with a "yosh!". Mitsuki, however, didn't look convinced. He stared her down for a few more seconds before shrugging and giving her what looked like a fake smile. At least she wasn't the only one.

"Did you win?" Boruto yelled excitedly, causing the brunette to glance over and smirk at her. Sarada gave her a certain gesture she'd seen her mom give to people who pissed her off, causing her to gasp and turn back around with an angry huff. Boruto gave Sarada a high five, assuming she had won. Sarada didn't dare correct him. Mitsuki did nothing but glare ferociously at the brunette. She wondered what that was about.

As Sarada, Boruto, and Mitsuki chatted amongst themselves, Shino cleared his throat. He decided to start naming off the locations of every team's sensei whether they were listening or not. Sarada quickly signaled her secret boyfriend to stay quiet as Shino spoke.

"Team 3," Shino paused as Sarada perked up at her team's number, "your sensei will be in the woods, at the place where the bugs danced," Their teacher winked at them before moving on, causing the trio to sport mischievous grins on their faces. Swiftly, the three of them grabbed their bags and headed out the door. Mitsuki lead the way, having memorized the route they had taken, Sarada in the back, embarrassed that she had forgotten the way so easily, and Boruto in the middle, looking around in awe, just like the first time they had gone.

At long last, they reached their designated location. There stood Konohamaru, smirking with one hand on his hip. "Surprise!" He yelled, trying to pull off a sexy pose but failing miserably. The trio laughed at his attempt, making him sputter and straighten, cheeks flushing. He flickered over to where his students were standing and patted them all on the head. "You guys are sooooo tiny! Anyways, let's start by introducing ourselves with our names, goals, likes, dislikes, the usual."

Boruto went first reluctantly, as he was the one Konohamaru stared at after his speech. "My name is Uzumaki Boruto, I want to protect the ones I love," he paused, slyly looking over to Sarada with a flushed grin, making Sarada turn redder than a tomato, "I like my little sister and my mom, and I hate my dad!" Konohamaru smirked, thinking about how he would tell Naruto about his son's little crush, and moved on to stare at Sarada expectantly.

"Okay, um," Sarada started, "my name is Uchiha Sarada, I want to become Hokage, I like my family and friends," Sarada ignored Boruto's pout, wanting to give herself a perfect image to protect herself from what? Her friends? So stupid.."And I dislike...brown hair."

"My name is Mitsuki, I want to find the truth, I like to explore, and I dislike liars," Mitsuki stated in monotone, his gaze unnervingly set on Sarada. She ignored him, masking everything but her pounding heart. She frantically wondered if he could hear it, it was pounding so strongly.

Konohamaru leaned back, smiling at his perfectly flawed team. _It looks like we have a few secrets here, now do we? I wonder how Sasuke will react,_ he thought. He had been about to go to sleep when Sasuke had arrived at his house and asked him to tell him everything he observed about the team, especially his daughter. He had accepted, wondering why Sasuke had to go to such lengths to learn more about his daughter. Why not just ask her? However, it wasn't his place to ask such a thing. He would do it for Sasuke, but most importantly, he would do it for Naruto. After all, if he was going to give away information anyway, why not tell more than one person?

After Konohamaru-sensei had told them to meet him early in the morning tomorrow at the same place, Mitsuki took his separate way and waved goodbye. Boruto and Sarada laced their hands together and walked serenely towards Sarada's house. Both were blushing and looking at the ground. As they walked, Boruto spoke up about his insecurities.

"Hey Sarada, why didn't you say you liked me?" Sarada turned to look at him, stopping in her tracks, causing Boruto to stop walking as well. He refused to look at her. Sarada smiled, inwardly shouting about how adorable he was. She took a deep breath and bit her lip.

"It's supposed to be a secret, remember?"

"I know, but why? Why does it have to be a secret? Don't you like me?"

"Yes, but.. But my dad would never allow it. So we have to keep quiet okay? Just for a little longer?" Boruto nodded reluctantly, but was relieved that he wouldn't have to pretend they weren't together forever. They continued to walk in silence until they arrived at Sarada's door. Abruptly, it slammed open and there stood Sasuke. Sarada yanked her hand back before he could see that they had been holding each other's hands.

"P-Papa! Hi! What a surprise," Sarada croaked, nervously playing with her hands. Boruto began to hum and stare determinedly ahead. Sasuke narrowed his eyes at Boruto, grabbing his daughter's shoulder and dragging her inside before slamming the door shut in Boruto's face.

"Why was he here?" Sasuke demanded, crossing his arms and blocking Sarada's exit. Said girl was about to reply when her father glanced down at her hands and saw two white scars across her wrist. "And what are those? Did Boruto do this to you?" Sarada felt like dying. She wanted to die, to disappear down a 6 foot hole in the ground. Her wish was not granted.

"No, Boruto didn't do this to me, it was that girl, remember? From the fight? Anyways, I forced Boruto to drop me off because I was afraid of being alone," Sarada half-lied. Her pale face stood absolutely still as Sasuke scanned it for lies. He continued with his interrogation.

"Why were you afraid of being alone?"

Sarada cursed herself for telling the truth. "Well, um, I don't know.. After yesterday, I guess I thought she was going to kick my face in today." She felt ashamed of how much it killed her to tell the truth for once. She felt weak in front of her father. The voice, after being silent for most of the day, finally spoke up.

 _What did I tell you about the truth? It only makes you weaker. The truth is for weaklings. So lie, lie, lie, lie!_

Sasuke's eyes softened. "Okay, let's work this out. Starting tomorrow, you won't ever see that girl again. Does that make you feel better?" Sarada nodded.

"Yes," his daughter lied. He nodded, patted her shoulder and left for his shared bedroom. Sarada trudged and trudged up the steps. She somehow felt worse, like she had missed an opportunity for something. If lying was good, why did it feel so bad?

Sarada made one more cut that night. One cut and all of the tension bubbling underneath her skin bled out. She sighed in contentment, slumping to the floor, next to the side of her bed. She healed herself once more, and slept into another nightmare.

This time, she had been so angry at her parents that she brutally murdered them, the adults defenseless to her assault. She remembered when she awoke in the middle of the night, feeling so guilty she bit her lip until she tasted iron, her eyes shut tight in remorse. She felt like she was killing them slowly, slowly poisoning them with lies. Soon enough, they wouldn't even recognize her as their daughter anymore. And they'll let her drown in her own tears.

Sarada hoped that being on the same team as Boruto would cheer her up, but it hadn't one bit. Wasn't he her ultimate crush? Wasn't she supposed to be happy? Everything was perfect, waiting for her to enjoy it but she just _can't_.

She cried to herself until the sun rose. That was the moment when she decided that she was depressed and she needed help. If only she knew where to find it.


	14. Run, Run, Run Away

**DisClaimeR: I don't own Naruto!**

 **Notes: Again, wonderful lady named FailingErin helped inspire me. Love that girl!**

"What brings you here today, Sarada?" Naruto smiled, clasping his hands together on his desk. Unexpectedly, his visitor had been none other than Sasuke's daughter. He welcomed the surprise with open arms.

There Sarada stood in all her glory. She wore her usual red top and white shorts with her black leggings and sandals. She wore her hair down and straightened for the special occasion of visiting her role model. After all, if she couldn't find help in her family or friends, why not her role model? He would help her-she was sure of it. She knew he had some genjutsu under his sleeve, he had to, after all he was Hokage. He had to do _something_ about this fucking voice.

"Um, Mr. Hokage, could I...just.. _talk_ to you about something?" Sarada stumbled over her words, berating herself on the inside as the voice laughed and laughed and laughed. She held down her tears with all her strength. She couldn't believe how much of a pathetic mess she was. How will Naruto think of her now?! Naruto sensed her nerves and scratched the back of his head, not knowing how to deal with such things, thinking of ways to calm her down.

"Of course, Sarada! Please, talk away," Naruto chuckled awkwardly, groaning on the inside. If only Sarada could look up through the high pedestal she put him on and see how much of a mess _he_ really was. No such luck. She cleared her throat, swinging her arms as she went. Naruto waited patiently, genuinely interested in what she had to say. Nothing could prepare him for what she said next.

"Please, please, _please_ make it stop," Sarada mumbled, eyes glancing around in fear. She had no idea when the voice would be back again. She had to be careful or else it would strike her in the back. Naruto raised his eyebrows in surprise and confusion. He had never seen her in this state before. He would definitely notify Sasuke about this later.

"Tell what to stop, Sarada?" Naruto asked carefully, keeping up his appearance with a blazing smile. The last thing he wanted to do was scare this girl even more. She took a deep breath, and finally she could not hold her tears any longer. They poured out in clumps, and Sarada began to hiccup. Naruto stared, shocked, unable to move.

"It's in my head, it won't leave me alone," Sarada rushed, pausing to take several big gulps of air, "It _knows_ things, it won't leave. Me. _Alone_!" She showed her wrists, and alas Naruto's facade fell away. She took in Naruto's shocked face and a wave of pure fear rolled over her. He was disgusted in her. He never wanted to see her again, she was sure of it, just by that look on his face, that terrible, terrible look. "I shouldn't be here. Forget I said anything," She sobbed, putting her face into the crook of her elbow and running, running far, far away. Just like always.

Naruto said nothing as she left. He stared at the empty space that Sarada had once been, haunted by memories of an innocent girl scared to death. She had been so fucking pale... He finally snapped out of his reverie, head snapping up with his thoughts. "Sarada?!" Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. She was in trouble and he had just _let her leave._ This wasn't good. He panicked, clumsily making a Shadow Clone and giving it instructions to _find Sasuke and tell him everything_.

The Hokage sat back down in his chair, sighing. He was suddenly interrupted by Konohamaru bursting through the doors. "Is everything okay, Naruto?" When Naruto nodded, the Jonin continued. "I have some news for you, don't worry, it's good!"

Naruto raised an eyebrow at Konohamaru's mischievous grin.

"Your son has a little crush."

Sarada ran through alleyways, little dips in the village where nobody could possibly expect to find her. She felt ashamed of herself for ever speaking. Now she had ruined everything. All her bonds had been severed because she messed them all up. It was all her fault. She sounded absolutely crazy in there, looking back upon it now. The voice sharpened its knife with a terrible nails-on-a-chalkboard sound. It shocked her with its words.

 _Just kill yourself. It's pathetic to watch you mess everything up._ It began to chant.

A great weight suddenly fell on top of her head, making the girl trip and fall, scraping her arms and legs. She couldn't get up, not when she had mentally given up. Nobody was on her side anymore. Why would they be? She really was pathetic.

So she laid on the stones, blood oozing from her knees, the only thing that comforted her. She laid there for what seemed like hours, on the ground, as civilians passed by without a thought about her.

"Sarada? Is that you?" Boruto quickly rushed over to her side, inspecting her injuries. "Holy _shit,_ this is definitely not good. What's wrong? What happened?"

Sarada only sniffled in response. With her boyfriend's help, she slowly got up. She noticed grocery bags full of some of her favorite brands of food off to the side. Boruto clutched her hand with an iron grip for support, extracting some antibiotic cream from one of his grocery bags. She winced as he cleaned her bloody wounds. _I must have been running really fast_ , Sarada thought distractedly, distantly.

Boruto, ever the surprising one, also had some tape in his back pocket. After he finished wrapping her knees and hands, he looked up at her and frowned. "Tell me what's really going on. I know you've been acting strange, so spill it!"

The raven took a deep breath, her mind tingling and spinning out of control.

 _He wants nothing more than to stab you in the back. Come on, Sarada, don't you see through his lies?_

 _He's not lying!_ Sarada tried to fight back, tried, tried, tried, but trying was never enough for her. Not for her mother, not for her father, and certainly not for herself.

 _Yes, he is. He's taunting you. Why can't you see it? So fucking stupid._

 _He's..different than the others! He's gotta be!_

 _LIES!_

"Shut UUP!" Sarada screamed in agony, thrashing about, clutching her head. Boruto held her, smiling in victory as she broke down. He couldn't stand the thought of these walls of hers breaking them apart. He would get to the center of the problem, no matter what it took.

" _Tell me, dattebasa_!"

"MAKE IT STOP!"

"What the _fuck_ is going on?"

"Dad?!"

Naruto rushed over to Sarada, cursing as he went. "Sarada, did he do anything to you?" The girl didn't answer, suddenly quiet, staring numbly at the ground. She sat absolutely still in Boruto's arms. "Boruto, what the fuck did you do to her?!" Boruto glared at his father, disgusted at the accusation.

"What?! I didn't do anything to her! I was trying to help her!" Boruto growled, eyes glinting with anger. Naruto sighed, closing his eyes in relief.

"Okay, okay, I believe you, I'm sorry," Naruto mumbled, rubbing his son's back comfortingly. He knew his son wouldn't, not after what he just heard from Konohamaru. But he just needed to get a grip on what was happening. _Hold it together_ , he told himself. "We need to get her to her mom at the hospital, quickly."

And so Boruto got one arm, and Naruto got the other. Together they hauled her doll-like, seemingly lifeless body to the local hospital, where Sakura was hurriedly rushing to check on her next patient.

Naruto really wanted to talk with Sarada, work things out. He wanted to make it up to her for treating her so badly. He knew about how she felt about him, he was her role-model. Yet he had only disappointed her. He would make this right, he knew he would. He just needed to talk.

Meanwhile, Sarada said nothing. She felt numb to everything around her, like nothing she was experiencing was real. She wasn't real. This was all a horrible nightmare that she would wake up from later. Just a dream.

A brown haired girl sat on a bench, watching the Hokage and his son carry her rival away. She smirked. That little bitch was going to get a little visit, and this time she was going to finish the job _right_.


	15. Author's Note Two

**Hello, lovelies! Unfortunately, I will not be online for two weeks because I am going to be on vacation, without my computer.**

 **I am so sorry about this, and wish it could be different, but that's not the case. I will be thinking out the plot though and where I should go from now.**

 **If there are any ideas you guys would like to tell me, feel free, and please tell me what I can change if it isn't that good-it's my first time writing on here.**

 **Anyways, I hope you have a wonderful day! I'll be back soon!**


	16. On the Way

**Disclaimer: Naruto is too awesome to be owned by me. I have to admit it.**

 **Notes: I'M SORRY I WAS GONE SO LONG BUT NOW I'M BACK! It may seem like the story is ending, but in actuality, I intent to continue this for a long ass time. Sarada has gone through a lot, so there's gonna be a lot to fix. I want to clear up any suspicions about this, so there. Also, I'm going to go a lot slower. I'm sorry about the fast pace this story has taken on, but I'm going to fix it. Thank you all for reading my story, and I hope you enjoy this chapter. GOODNIGHT, WHEREVER YOU ARE!**

"Is she okay?" One of the nurses asked, concerned for the rather pale young girl in between the Hokage and his son. Naruto shook his head, eyes furrowed in concentration.

"Have you seen Sakura? A Sakura Uchi-Haruno?" Naruto had forgotten that Sakura liked to go by her maiden name when she was with her clients. It was more dangerous to mention the name Uchiha in case of scorn. The nurses shook their heads and Boruto groaned his impatience, already running to the next group of medical ninjas. Naruto sighed and began to carry Sarada over his shoulder. She didn't mind. She didn't mind anything right about now. Why should she? It wasn't real.

As the trio rushed through the halls, they ran into Mitsuki, who had been swiftly updated on the current events by Boruto. He swiftly yelled, "over here," and led the way to the pink haired medic.

Confused, Boruto inquired, "How do you know where Sarada's mom is?" Mitsuki simply shrugged, smirked and ran ahead, skillfully dodging people as he went. Boruto stared in wonder.

"Boruto, help me out here!" Naruto yelled, as he began to lose his grip on Sarada. She slumped to the side, staring blankly at the hospital's tiles. She was content, peaceful even. The voice had vanished, in fact, she couldn't hear anything anymore. It was so quiet..Sarada wanted to stay in this moment forever.

Boruto looked back and groaned, yelling over the crowd, "Just hold on!" Naruto tried to glare at his son, but realized he couldn't. He was actually having fun. The breeze ran through his short blond hair like someone was patting him on the head, and he looked up, grinning. He whispered his thanks to his mother and father, before speeding up and inevitably catching up with Boruto and Mitsuki.

He smiled when he saw her, his former teammate, Sakura Haruno Uchiha. She was looking down at the kids, chewing her lip with interest and concern. She glanced up worriedly when Naruto arrived at the scene, taking in her daughter's appearance.

"I don't see any untreated wounds. What are you talking about?" Sometimes Sakura could be a little dense when it came to mental pain, only focusing on the physical and treating only the physical wounds.. But Sarada was going to teach her about it, Naruto simply knew it. He leaned down, sliding Sarada off her shoulder as she stumbled clumsily into her mother's arms.

"I-We think she's having an..episode of some kind. Check her wrists, Sakura."

"I already notic-wait. There's another one. When I saw them, she only had two scars. ...Are you telling me.." Sakura finally got it. All the lies, all the secrets, all the strange behavior. She _knew_ something had been bothering her daughter. "Oh my god," Sakura whispered, touching her daughter's wrist gently. "She did this to herself.."

Naruto nodded solemnly, a hard look on his face. "She told me she was hearing this voice in her head and that it wouldn't stop. You need to check her in, she needs some rest...and some mental health evaluations." He nudged his son and his son's teammate to follow him and they left without a single word, giving Sakura some privacy as she wept for herself and for her daughter, for the difficult future yet to come.

"Are you sure you'll be okay here?"

Sarada nodded numbly. Sakura sighed in defeat. She was hoping to get her daughter to talk, but no such luck so far. Sarada slouched back into her hospital bed, fluttering her eyes closed. Sakura took the opportunity to leave her in peace as she hurriedly moved to her next client, desperate to distract herself from her own self-criticism. She questioned her ability to be a good mother before shaking her head violently, walking out the door and covering up the tear tracks on her cheeks.

Meanwhile, Sarada laid still, a stiff body with an empty head. She stared at the ceiling, making faces in each tile. She rolled to her left, facing the open window that gently gifted her with soft breezes from the outside world.

 _I'm so sorry, Sarada, who did this to you? You didn't deserve this._ The quiet had broken into shattered pieces. Sarada flinched, surprised. Who was this? This certainly was not her self esteem talking, her self esteem hated her. With the silence no longer existing, she felt a great weight rest on top of her head and anxiety settle in for the future ahead (much like her mother had feared).

She desperately wished for someone to talk to. Someone to open up with, someone who wouldn't judge her. At the same time, she knew that it would never happen, nobody like that in this cruel world existed. Everybody judged. There was no escaping it.

She prepared for sleep, fatigued by her own inner ramblings, when the door slid open slowly. Suddenly Sarada was wide awake. Her muddled vision was able to spot out brown hair and a wicked grin. Fuck. Not her. Please anyone but her. Sarada felt her fantasy realm slipping away from her even more so, reality slowly sinking in through the cracks of her perfect world. She gulped in preparation.

"W-what are you doing here?" Sarada stuttered, cursing herself internally for accepting the role of the weak victim. "You aren't supposed to be here!" The brunette simply stretched her arms out, winking at her and putting a finger to her lips.

"Surprise, surprise, you finally went insane! Congratulations! You know, if it weren't for your little boyfriend, you would be here for more than a simple breakdown," the brunette informed her, a hateful spark in her eyes. She extracted a kunai from her jacket pocket, hoping to bring fear to the young Uchiha.

She was successful. The raven shivered and widened her eyes with dread. She felt weak and helpless. She hadn't won before-what was going to make her win now? "Please just.. I don't want to fight anymore...Please," Sarada whimpered, her knuckles white from gripping the hospital's white bed sheets. Her eyebrows slanted up in a excruciatingly sad expression-the expression meant for those who were giving up. But the brunette couldn't have this. She needed to make her suffer through the pain she's suffered through. She was going to have to give her a couple scars that she would never forget. She needed to absolutely crush her.

That was her plan, and underneath her plan was her motive, you see. The reason why she had put her plan into place. Her own pain. So that's why, when she saw the scars on the girl's skinny, pale wrist when she used them to cover her tears, (again, much like her mother had) the brunette stomped to a shocked halt. Her face morphed into a pained grimace. She had been telling the truth all along.

Sarada flinched at the abrupt door slam, shaking as she carefully looked up. The brunette was gone. She nervously smiled, her fingers twitching, ready to grab onto the closest thing to her. She found that it kept her grounded inside her silent world of her dreams. She didn't want to let go, not ever.

 _Just a dream,_ Sarada thought as she tried to push herself back out of reality, _I was hallucinating. That couldn't possibly have happened._

It didn't work.

She groaned, her headache growing by the second, and flung herself to her white, white pillow, matching the rest of the damn room. Although her face was still pale, and she felt worse, Sarada was beginning to connect back to her horrifying reality. In a doctor's eyes, this would be a good thing.

And that's when the door slammed open, Sakura breathing heavily in rage. "Sarada, who was here just now?! What did she want with you?!" Her face had aged slightly from the time she last saw her mother. It didn't look healthy. Sakura breathed in, out, trying to gain her composure but failing miserably. She looked at her daughter with, for the first time in her life, hateful eyes. For a second, Sarada thought it was directed at her.

"I'm sorry, mother." Why was she apologizing? She didn't do anything wrong. Sarada realized that instinct was taking over. With that hate-filled stare staring at her, she couldn't do much else but say sorry. "She was the one who hurt me. In the fight. I didn't know how to get her out."

Sakura then knew that Sarada thought it was her own fault, and stopped glaring. She gave her a light, hesitant smile. Her eyes displayed love and kindness, hiding the pity circling beneath. Sarada relaxed, and let go of the bed sheets she didn't even realize she had started gripping. Sakura nodded in understanding and was finally able to calm down.

"Listen, I, um.. You shouldn't be apologizing. I should. I'm sorry, I was supposed to be watching over you and I failed. I'm so, so sorry." Sarada knew her mother wasn't just talking about letting the brunette get inside her room. She slowly got up and walked steadily to her mother and they embraced each other warmly. Sakura struggled not to cry, her face blushing with effort. Sarada bit her lip.

"No, mom, this wasn't your fault. I should have said something sooner. I'm sorry." And wasn't that the truth? Wasn't it actually her own fault? Like everything else? Guilt plunged into her gut, paralyzing her from the waist down. She could hear distant menacing giggles inside her mind, and she knew exactly who it was. Her face became paler than before.

"I guess we're both sorry, huh?" Sarada smiled, a tear running down the side of her nose. Sarada looked up at her mother, and they snuggled closer. Sarada felt her mother's heart beat faster than usual, and she assumed her mother felt her own quick heartbeat as well.

The silent room comforted Sarada, just a bit. But she knew it wouldn't last long. Not with that stupid fucking voice breathing down her neck. She hated it, hated it, hated it with all her might. That being said, it didn't mean that she was fighting it. No, that was far from the truth. Sarada may have given up, but she had a feeling that maybe, maybe help was on the way.


	17. Another Freaking Author's Note

**Hey guys, again, I'm so sorry that I haven't updated in literally forever. Lots of things have been going on and I guess I've lost confidence in my writing skills, but seeing all your comments gave me a little hope. I hope that before I continue this story I can write a bit better, I'm really sorry to you all! Thanks for sticking with me, I hope to improve soon so that you guys can receive another chapter finally, haha! Anyways, have a good day/night!**

 **-The Author**


	18. What Happens Next?

**Yo! Guess who's back?! Me! Yep! I had the day off, so I figured, why not write?! Here's a little gift, I may or may not have improved throughout the course of one day, but I'm working on it! Plus, I couldn't resist. Anyways, enjoy! :)**

 **Disclaimer: Own Naruto I do not.**

Sarada lay in her hospital bed once more as Sakura ran a couple physical tests on her, just in case. She checked her heart rate, breathing, ears, eyes, etc. When Sakura finally finished, she let out a sigh that had been building up in her chest the entire time. Another doctor slid through the open door right as Sakura opened her mouth. Sakura paused for a second, looking at the stranger before speaking.

"Sarada..do you mind answering a couple questions we have for you?" Sakura asked, looking down at the floor as Sarada swung her gaze to her mother in surprise. She nodded hesitantly.

"Uh..sure. Go ahead."

The overweight, brown-haired (ugh) nurse stepped forward to sit on the edge of Sarada's bed. She looked curiously at the girl.

"Tell me about this voice you say you hear. What does it tell you?" Sarada blushed with embarrassment and anger. She felt ultimately betrayed. Her idol, the one she trusted most, had stabbed her in the back. She wanted so, almost too, badly to lie and ask the lady what she was talking about. But then she saw the pleading look on her mother's face. And she couldn't resist such an opportunity for understanding.

"Well, um.. it insults me most of the time. Tells me I'm not a good person and stuff." Sarada felt so damn awkward saying this out loud. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea. She was even more convinced that she was right when Sakura cringed, sympathizing with her daughter.

"I see..How bad are you feeling right now on a scale from one to ten?"

"Maybe like a...6 or a 7?"

"How long had this been going on for?"

"A week?"

"How do you feel about your parents?"

"What?" Sarada glanced at her mother before looking back to the doctor in shock. What kind of question was that? "Um.. they're good."

"Yes, but what about your father? Are you angry? Sad?"

"Why would I be any of those things?"

"Because he left you, didn't he?" Silence. Sarada clenched her teeth at the question. She didn't know how she would cope for much longer.

"Yes..yes he did," Sarada growled, grudgingly. She scowled at the doctor, not trusting her one bit. She didn't like where this was going. Flames of hatred for her father licked at her stomach, rising at the bait.

"I think that's enough for now," Sakura cut in, putting an arm out in front of her daughter and looking down at the woman through narrowed eyes. Said woman stood up slowly, eyeing Sarada's mother carefully.

As soon as the brunette left, Sarada burst with desperation, already having figured out why the doctor had visited her. "Mom, please, I don't like her. At least let me decide my own doctor, if I have to have one."

Sakura smiled uneasily at her daughter, eyes glancing to the door before returning back to Sarada. She sighs shakily, a hand rubbing at her face. Sarada's eyes dropped to her own clenched fists. Great, she made her mother stressed again. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Sarada watched her mother's feet disappear behind the white door. Everything was so fucking white. The only colorful thing in this room was her beige ninja pack.. Sarada straightened with a jolt.

This was not her beige book bag, no, she had left that at home after deciding to skip the meeting with her team leader and teammates. Sakura had already been at the hospital and Sasuke was off doing who knows what, so nobody had inquired why she wasn't bringing her bag to school.

Inside this pack, were medical supplies, medical tape, ointment, etc. But there was also Boruto's kunai that she had quickly stuffed in there. Nobody knew this except her. That's probably why they didn't take it away..

But that didn't mean they wouldn't know if she did harm herself. It would be clearly evident on her wrist. But.. it didn't have to be her wrist.. did it?

Sakura reentered her hospital room after a couple hours, Sarada staring blankly out the window, her face expressionless. Her mother shrugged off her own wariness at that fact, plastering on a smile as she leaned down to Sarada's level.

"Hey honey, I know you were supposed to meet up with your team today, so you can quickly go home, gather up what you need, and head out, okay? Me and you, we'll talk about what happened later, okay?" Sarada nodded, eyebrows furrowing. She made no move to leave. Sakura frowned uncertainly.

"Sarada, honey?"

"..Okay." Finally the raven scooted to the side of the bed and stood. She grabbed her ninja pack and silently left the room. Just like a ninja should. Sakura's frown turned into a watery scowl. Her daughter was not okay..and neither was she.

Sarada moodily snatched her book bag and slung it over her shoulder, at war with herself, nothing unusual at this point. She had thought by now her mom would take her more seriously. Instead she had simply left her with a 'we'll talk later' and a slap on the wrist. No, not even that, just a glare. But even that was more than she could handle, so she had no right to be upset over this.

And so, she trudged to the same place she had met her sensei last time. Sure enough, there they were: Konohamaru, Mitsuki, and, of course, Boruto. She blushed and bit her lip as they stopped doing drills and stared at her in surprise. Boruto was the first to react, rushing over to her, grabbing a hold of her shoulders and giving her a sad look, "What happened? Are you ok now?"

Sarada managed a swift half-smile before it fell apart. One glance at Mitsuki told her that she shouldn't dare lie. She did anyway. "I'm good now, thanks Boruto. It was..really nice of you to help me.." She acted embarrassed, moving through the actions of looking the other way and holding her arms to her chest emotionlessly. Boruto fell for the bait, rubbing the back of his head with a flustered grin. Mistuki narrowed his eyes. Konohamaru looked on, confused, but enjoying the drama.

"What were you doing before I got here, sensei?" Sarada changed the subject, crossing her arms over her chest, desperate to get the attention off of herself. Konohamaru grinned.

"We were just doing some drills, and now that we have you I'll train with Boruto and you'll train with Mitsuki, sound like a plan? Practice taijutsu." With that, Sarada nodded reluctantly, and Konohamaru headed off into another clearing, Boruto frowning and glancing back at her as he followed. Sarada swallowed before turning to Mitsuki who was eyeing her dangerously.

"Well, we should probably head to another clearing as well-" Sarada mumbled, pushing past her teammate and stumbling to a halt when Mitsuki roughly grabbed her arm. The raven froze, not daring to look behind her. Absolute silence. She was surprised the voice hadn't spoken a word yet.

"This clearing will do just fine," Mitsuki spoke so quietly, Sarada had to strain her ears and still her own breath. Without another word, she nodded and Mitsuki let go. She walked till she was about 10 feet in front of him, then stopped and got into a defensive position. She had a feeling he was going to be the one on offensive this round.

And she was right. Mitsuki, using his stretching ability, was relentless in his attacks, and Sarada didn't know how she managed to deflect them all. After he realized that wasn't working, he pulled out a kunai and started using his close range combat skills. Sarada flipped open her pack and pulled out her own (Boruto's) kunai before charging in with a 'shannaro!' Although she was confused as to why they would be using their kunai, she would be a coward if she just took it all without a word! She activated her Sharingan to show him she meant business, but Mitsuki shook his head..

"Only taijutsu, remember?" Sarada growled, deactivated her Sharingan and bent her knees. She was ready.

Mitsuki lunged with all he had, Sarada easily dodging with a quick pivot to the left, but he was faster. He jump-kicked her, aiming for her stomach, but Sarada's own arm defended herself just in time. She stumbled backwards, unconsciously reactivating her Sharingan with her building adrenaline, but Mitsuki either didn't care or didn't notice because he kept lunging fist after foot after kunai.

Her moves became faster, as she was able to identify his next moves. The game went on, both of them wearing down the other's stamina bit by bit. Sarada was able to get a few punches in, which would definitely be leaving some bad bruises, considering her punching strength. However, so had Mitsuki, as she sported a split lip and a couple cuts. He was surprisingly skilled with a kunai.

Gasping for breath her body wasn't able to provide, Sarada jumped back onto a tree limb, desperate for a break. Mitsuki was already there, his stretching ability landing him right next to her. Startled, the raven leaped back only to lose her balance and fall. She closed her eyes tight, some kind of peace enveloping her at the thought of being in that silent void again.

Instead she coughed, eyes ripping open to see that she was hanging 20 feet above ground. Mitsuki's arm was wrapped tight around her waist, and all became quiet. Finally, Mitsuki spoke.

"It's about time you told us the truth, Sarada. I'm sure I'm far from the first one to ask you this question, but we do care about you. So, when something's up, our first reaction, of course, is to know what exactly _is_ up. When will you get the idea that we are here to help? That you shouldn't torture yourself like this?"

Sarada said nothing, eyes narrowing at the ground, a grimace forming on her lips. He didn't know that she deserved everything she gave herself. He wasn't her, of course he didn't know her true self. If she ever told him 'what was up' he'd never want to talk to her ever again. And Sarada knew she didn't want that to happen. Despite her intense want to spill (again) she knew she had to stay strong.

"I said I'm fine." Mitsuki sighed, placing her back on the tree limb she had fallen from and released her. She sat down, knees pulled up to her chest and hands on either cheek. "..Thanks for asking, though."

"Sure." The awkward silence was nothing less than uncomfortable, but the two waited until Konohamaru and Boruto stepped into the clearing, both panting and covered in dirt. It was well into the evening when they finally came.

"Hey, who won?" Boruto grinned, his sensei rolling his eyes behind him. Before Sarada could admit her loss, Mitsuki called,

"It was a tie." She didn't know what she had done to deserve such kindness, but she didn't question it. She leaped down, Mitsuki following soon after as they headed back to civilization. The girl stayed silent throughout the entire trip back, lost in depressing thoughts. She hadn't had any time to think at all today, so now everything was coming back. The voice included.

 _What the hell was that?! First the brunette, now Mitsuki? And your sins don't even end there, you're worrying your team_ _ **and**_ _your mother. What's wrong with you? Can't you be considerate just once?_

 _I didn't ask them to worry about me!_ She snapped back at the voice, too agitated to just agree without a fight.

 _You could at least pretend better, shannaro! Then they wouldn't be worried in the first place. But nooo, you just have to be that much of an attention-seeker!_

Sarada sighed heavily, catching the attention of her boyfriend. "Hey, what's wrong?" He whispered, glancing at the others ahead of them before waiting for her to catch up. After a few minutes of nothing but walking, Boruto tried again. "Listen, I'm really sorry about earlier, but I thought that I could maybe help you..." Nothing. Nothing else until Konohamaru and Mitsuki waved goodbye and went their separate ways.

Boruto reached for Sarada's hand but she yanked it away, scowling. Boruto stared at the ground, the oncoming storm reflecting in his troubled face. "I'll be at your window later tonight, okay?" Sarada left without giving so much as an answer. Boruto kicked the ground, rain starting to pour down from the dark clouds that had quickly surrounded the village. He headed home.

Meanwhile, Sarada had stopped, letting the rain soak her clothes and run down her skin as she looked back at him over her shoulder, heart breaking with regret. She would make it up to him when he came over. Stupid, stupid, stupid...

The 12 year old opened the door, weakly calling out a 'I'm home' before taking off her water-filled sandals, leaving wet footprints leading all the way to the kitchen. She was met with the sight of her mother and father talking in grave tones. They turned to Sarada, and Sakura motioned to the chair next to her.

"Sit, it's time we talked." Sarada nodded and took a seat. This was going to take a while.


	19. AAAHHHM BACK FINALLY

I know, I know, I am very shitty for leaving you guys like this, I'm sorry I went through a lot. Like, a lot. A few life-changing shits have happened, but now I'm back and I truly feel confident in my ability as a writer. For those who held on as long as they have, thank you so much. You are truly apart of me and this fan fiction, sticking with me through and through. I can't update every week, but I'll be trying a lot more. My motivation has levelled up. Time to get fucking started! Expect an update soon.

-The Shittiest Fucking Author


	20. Complications

NOTE: YES. I DID IT. I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR GUYS' THOUGHTS AND REVIEWS, THEY HELP MORE THAN YOU THINK! ALSO THANK YOU FOR BEING SO GODDAMN PATIENT! YOU GUYS DESERVE AN AWARD!

Disclaimer: I am not in the immediate possession of Le Naruto.

The silence was really uncomfortable. Sarada kept debating whether or not she should say something- _anything_ -and then another part of her told her that she should just wait for her parents to give her something first. If she had learned anything in the past week or so, it was that it's better to just give out whatever's needed instead of accidentally bleeding your entire heart out. Even worse when they have less idea of what the fuck's going on then you do.

So, Sarada waited. And waited. And waited, until finally, Sakura cleared her throat, then silence again. And now they were back at square one. Whatever kind of contest this was, Sarada was going to win. Hell, she'd even get out her homework and start working on it, right there. Oh, wait. There wasn't any paper homework due anymore since she had graduated from the Academy. A sudden claustrophobic feeling fell over her, and finally Sarada threw them a small bone to alleviate the pressure. God, they needed to give her a break.

"So, what do you..want to know?" Sarada twiddled with her fingers nervously, refusing to look up into their eyes. She had done her part.

Sakura gave Sasuke a look, then cleared her throat again, this time to actually speak. It took her a few times before she was able to voice anything, Sarada no doubt being the cause of the extra lump in her throat and the slight water in her eyes she had seen when she had walked in. That felt like hours ago. Sarada hoped this ended soon. She would deal with everything some other day, maybe. She just needed...some more time.

"Sarada, we-I-Naruto told me about the.." Sakura pointed at her wrist, certain that if she had said it out loud, she would've burst into tears. Sarada didn't need to look up to know what she was talking about, and her teeth grit against each other.

"Listen, I-" her mind was racing a mile a minute, cruising quickly through excuse after excuse after excuse, "I-my wrist was itching and I thought that maybe the itch was deeper than just the surface so I-"

"Cut the bull." Sasuke dead-panned, eyebrow twitching in annoyance as he set his arms on the table solemnly. Sarada felt a flash of fear, then realizing that _this is her dad, she shouldn't be afraid of him. Sure, he had been gone for a while. A while being most of her entire life. But still._ "She asked you a question. I suggest you answer it."

Sarada didn't know why her first impulse had been to lie. It had simply left her mouth, and she _had_ been thinking, hell, her mind had sped through multiple excuses, but she hadn't really _thought_ about it.

 _This is your father, Sarada. Jesus Christ, it's time you stopped being such a victimizing bitch. Grow the fuck up._

The encouragement was less than helpful. Sarada sighed, still not daring to look up.

"Look, remember when we..we had that talk? Before? It's just that-"

"Look up." Sarada growled under her breath, angrily craning her neck unnecessarily high in an attempt to assert herself. Impulsively, she decided that maybe he didn't _deserve_ the truth.

 _You may be a bitch, but your father's even worse. That's probably where you got your shitty personality from. Just like that nurse said, he abandoned you. You and your mother._

Sometimes, she didn't know what side the voice was on, but hell if she cared about that at the moment. Sakura was glancing between them nervously, looking ready to intervene but simultaneously wanting the two to work things out by themselves.

"You ever get just so bored that you're willing to do _anything_ to stop the boredom? _Literally anything?_ God, was I bored, but, _god, was it worth it_ ," Sarada hissed, leaning over the table slightly with a prominent scowl. Sasuke's eyes narrowed, glittering dangerously.

"Stop lying. You wouldn't do that."

"How would you know that? Huh? You haven't been here in forever!"

"I know my own daughter. This isn't her." And that single, monotonous statement hit her hard. Her eyes widened like she had been shot, lungs deflated like someone had kicked her. Ouch. And then she felt the raging fire, and she allowed it to consume her, too lost to do anything but hurt him like he had hurt her, had hurt her for all these years she thought she'd left behind.

"Have you ever thought just once that maybe it was because of you? That this is all your fault? If you had been here for me-for us," she gestured to Sakura pointedly, and the rage had built up higher than it ever had, the memories of her mother faking a smile whenever she asked about him, hearing her muffled sobs in the middle of the night fueling an uncontrollable fire. And for a moment lost in time, just for a second, she thought, _maybe this is what being an Uchiha really is. "That we wouldn't be so fucked up in the first place?! That we wouldn't even be here, that mom would d actually grow up happily like she deserves, with the confidence she deserves! And me! Now I'm fucking hurting myself because god knows it's the only pain that isn't given to me by you!"_

Stoic silence. An icy aura had spread around the kitchen table, and both parents were pissed. Sakura clenched her fist, full-blown tears overflowing her eyes, a grimace on her face. Sasuke had grown tense, stiff, and he stood up abruptly, stalking towards her. Sarada glared up at him as he towered over her, but Sakura decided that enough was enough.

"Who told you that you were allowed to use such words?! Sarada, you've crossed the line! Sasuke's doing the best he can, and you should respect that! And what is all this nonsense about my lack of self esteem and happiness? Of course I'm happy, shannaro! I'm the luckiest woman alive to have you _and your father_."

"Mom-"

"You don't know anything."

"..Excuse me?" Sarada wasn't expecting that. Again, that spike of fear returned, and Sarada couldn't find a proper argument to dispel the thought.

"You know nothing about what's going on. What's happening in the world outside of yours. You have no right to make such claims."

Sarada was fuming, but she was hurting more. Coming to her senses again was like an extra slap to the face after being struck with a thick log of wood.

 _If anything, this isn't him. This is not your father. If he knows you, then you know him, and this is not Sasuke Uchiha._

And it finally crossed her mind that maybe it hurt so much because she had gone and spilled her heart out again. _You had one. Goddamn. Job._

"Shannarroo!" Sarada yelled, kicking the chair to the wall behind her, making it break into three. Then, as quick as lightning, she raced out the door, not bothering to slam it shut on her way out. It was still raining, but in a way, it relieved her just a bit. It was as if the rain was melting away all her emotions, the ones she didn't need, the ones that really shouldn't even exist. And it all clicked. The sound of the rain echoing in her ears, and the emptiness that seemed to hit her from out of nowhere.

Her eyes were drier than normal, not wet with tears in the slightest. She felt like her insides had simply curled up and died and she was-she felt..nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Sarada stopped to pant for air, then stumbled against a tree nearby and started laughing. It started out low and bitter, then it had squeaked higher and higher, until she was hysterical, laughing so hard that she fell to her knees, clutching her stomach.

 _It's about fucking time. Don't you feel so much better already?_

"Sasuke..Sarada definitely crossed the line but that-you crossed it too." Sakura had her hands crossed, staring concernedly at her husband. She had stood up and walked over to his side, after realizing that he wasn't moving from his spot anytime soon. By then, she knew something was up.

Sasuke remained motionless for a few moments. Then, he looked up, and Sakura's concerned gaze turned into intense worry. She could see the pain in his eyes, she always had, but something told her that this was something bad. Really bad.

"Sasuke, what is it?"

"...It's Naruto."

Sakura's stomach dropped. she gulped before continuing, a cold sweat starting in her back and slowly making its way around.

"What about Naruto? What did he say?"

"..There's a change of plans. I won't be staying here as long as..I'd like to..anymore."

"What do you mean?! Didn't he promise you at least a month?" Sakura hated to admit it, but she was panicking. This was the worst timing. Then, her eyes darkened as she cracked her knuckles, frustration channeling into Naruto. Of course it's Naruto. It's always Naruto. "I'll talk to him!"

Sasuke gazed at her from the corner of his eye, sighing and perking up his position. "No, Sakura. It's fine. Besides, this is important. And it'd probably be better off if I went away for a while, considering the situation."

"No, Sasuke, you don't get it, I need you. _Especially_ now. _She_ needs you." Sakura pleaded, taking a few steps so that she was in front of him, gripping his shoulders gently. "Come on, Sasuke. You know she's only going to get angrier if you leave _now_. I'll talk to Naruto, okay? And we'll resolve this. I know it."

"Sakura..no. I think it's best if I go. Naruto said I should be on my way as soon as possible. I planned to take off after this conversation, resolved or not."

"You're leaving now?! But-"

"I know. But I'll be back. Very soon." He smiled lightly, then poked her forehead with his middle and index fingers fondly. Immediately, Sakura's face seemed to relax and brighten. The creases of worry finally smoothened out.

"Alright, Sasuke. Be home soon." With that, she tilted her head to kiss him, but he turned away, smirking, gathering his cloak and weapons before softly shutting the open door.

Meanwhile, Sakura nodded to herself in determination. It was okay. Sasuke had left at the most inopportune times multiple times before, this was nothing she couldn't handle. In fact, Sarada probably needed her mother's assurance, now more than ever. Sakura could fix this. She was a medic for Christ's sake, she was one of the strongest kunoichi in the village.

Now she just had to find Sarada. Bring her back. And really, actually _talk_ to her.

Sasuke was standing in front of Naruto. Both of their faces were solemn. They were alone, except for Kakashi and Yamato who stood stoically on either side of the doorway into the Hokage's office. The air was serious and tense.

"So you think that Kaguya's..back?"

"I got a message from Gaara. He said that he had sensed her chakra, just for a moment, near the borders of Sunagakure." Naruto's tone was gravelly with an edge. His eyebrows were furrowed in concern. "I hate to split you from them again, but, I don't think I have a choice.

"I understand." Sasuke lifted his head slightly in a challenge. "So, what do you need me to do?"

"Sarada?" Boruto whisper-shouted, lightly knocking on her window. Her room was completely dark, and there didn't seem to be any movement in the house at all. Not even the kitchen lights were on, nor the hallway's. Boruto's mouth twitched, wary of the eerie silence.

For some reason, tonight had been particularly easy to sneak out. His dad was nowhere in sight (which wasn't unusual, but still) and his mom had been asleep, as had Himawari. In fact, Himawari had bundle up cutely next to their mother's side in Hinata's bed and Boruto couldn't help but watch them for a few minutes affectionately before continuing on his mission.

Not a real mission, of course. Objective, maybe. Whatever. Whenever something bothered Boruto, he couldn't stop thinking about it until it was resolved. And now he was here, with nobody in sight. He couldn't help but feel a little unnerved.

He pondered if he should go back, but then stopped himself. It wasn't like him to give up so easily. This was Sarada, for god's sake, and he was aware now of what she could do. Fear threw his mind in circles, and Boruto decided, _fuck it, if it's for Sarada.._ before smashing the window in, landing clumsily on Sarada's bedroom floor with a few glass shards sticking from his legs.

"Fuck, ow, ow, ow, that hurts!" Boruto hissed, holding his leg in pain as his eyes adjusted to the dark. Then he spotted her bed, right up against the wall. The sheets were still made from this morning, untouched. Groaning, Boruto turned his attention back to his legs.

 _Goddammit, Sarada, you better be okay._

Boruto couldn't help but yelp when he ripped out the first shard. This wouldn't take too much time.


	21. The Aftereffects

QUICK NOTE: THERE IS KINDA GORY DETAILS INVOLVING THE EYE SO BEWARE. SKIP OVER IT. Also, short chapter, I know, but I will be posting more **today.** I've realized the more I put that kinda expectation on myself, the more I put off writing. Finally finally finally, here y'all go! :)

* * *

The crows were at it again. They circled around the trees towering above her and glared down at her with the intent of a vulture. As much as Sarada tried to ignore the ominous feeling in her bones, she couldn't deny that it was, in fact, still there and showed no signs of going away anytime soon. The uncomfortable feeling wasn't even that much of a feeling, just an odd kind of itch, or pressure pressing down on her head. Weird.

And Sarada couldn't seem to get over her newfound emotional capabilities, or rather, disabilities. She thought back to the less-than-satisfactory discussion with her parents, focused on the hurt she had felt and the gravity of each insult that her father had spit out-intentionally or not. But there was nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zero. Nothing.

Sarada Uchiha tried smiling, and it didn't carry the same exhausting weight of her forced ones. The weight was gone, and she didn't know how to feel about that now that the initial joy had faded. She shifted in her seat on the wet, fallen log before looking back down at the dirt, where the rain beat mercilessly into the earth.

Too many thoughts seemed to race in her head, but the sound of the rain dripping down, pouring now, made her eyelids droop close for minutes at a time. Her eyes hurt.

How long had she been sitting here? An hour? Two? Three? She had forgotten to bring anything in case she got bored, being in the moment and all, but there was no way she was going back to her house to get them. She wasn't ready to face them; not yet. Perhaps not ever.

You'll never be able to face them. It's time to let go, for Christ's sake. Go somewhere.

She considered the idea. So much has happened in the span of...what? A week? Two weeks? She didn't even know anymore, each day felt like another year off her life.

..But, Jesus Christ, she needed to think about this. Just leaving? What about Boruto? The team? Her parents? The Hokage? Everyone? Hell, her parents may be mad right now, sure, but if Sarada disappeared, they wouldn't just forget about her.

Would they?

Wouldn't they?

Nothing. Even the voice didn't seem to affect her anymore. Then again, why was she really even trying to get a rise out of herself in the first place? Wasn't this what she had wanted all along? Or was she selfish enough to not even give this new state..a chance?

Her chest felt hollow, and Sarada kept wondering, seriously considering, if she had any organs in her body anymore, because it sure didn't feel like it. She sat deathly still for a few seconds, contemplating, really feeling the gravity of the situation, when the log suddenly started scratching at her legs with an almost needle-like point. Points that were now scritching, biting deeper and deeper into her flesh, and she sat there as long as she could stand it before standing with a single gasp and, suddenly, the feeling was gone. She looked back down at the log, and stared confusedly at her bare thighs and black-clothes knees. Nothing. It had just been another illusion. Those were feeling more and more real, it seemed.

With that, she shrugged and finally stepped away from her seat. Her bottom hurt from sitting on wood so long, but so did her entire body. The adrenaline rush was long gone.

Then, an ambush.

What felt like hundreds of the biggest crows she's ever seen swooped from their position above and flew right into her. She yelped and screamed and flailed as a few claws got stuck in her hair and started to yank, others latching onto her arms and shoulders and legs. A storm of black feathers completely obscured her vision for a full minute without being able to breathe, until, finally, an opening-

"Enough!"

The crows were gone, not a single black feather in sight. But in their place stood the brunette girl who had been tormenting her from the beginning. She was smiling at her. Waving with her right hand and her left resting casually on her hip. The girl who had caused all this pain in the first place was right in front of her. The girl who needed to be brought down to her knees in order to understand the weight of what she'd done. The girl who came into her life and messed it all up. The girl who just wouldn't leave her the fuck alone and needed to be brought down and brought down now..

"Sasuke says hello. He didn't get the chance to say so after you fled like a little bitch."

She was so done.

"You bitch!" Sarada snarled, leaping to the girl in front of her and shoving her down, feeling twisted satisfaction fuel her forward once she heard the girl's scream. She had been waiting for so long to hear that single sound. And now she needed more.

At some point, the brunette got up and started to frantically crawl away, hands groping for something to latch onto, to which Sarada felt herself lose her humanity. It was easy, really, now that her moral judgment was out the window and her emotions were hollow. This felt good.

The raven bit into the brunette's arm, tearing as much as she could, red eyes fixed on the other's that were overflowing with tears. She loaded her punch and smashed the girl's head into the ground time after time again, and the vivid red was a sight to behold.

One of her eyes had popped, and lay sullen in the girl's eye socket. Clear liquid and little streams of blood trickled down her face, her nose obviously broken. Blood also draining from her ear, and Sarada started to panic.

Her wheezing breaths stilled along with her heart when the face beneath her changed to the one of her mother's. Then, she screamed.


	22. Girls are Weird

Boruto was _right_ there. Right there. He couldn't imagine what would have happened if he had simply stayed where he was, watching Sarada struggle. No, he had done the right thing. Even if it was dangerous.

He really should've thought about using his shadow clone jutsu beforehand, but there was no time for that. Not when Sarada was in trouble. Sarada, Sarada, Sarada. What was it about her? They fought _all_ the time. Sure, they had grown up together, they had pretty much become the cliche childhood frenemies, but.. Somehow it felt different than the comic books he used to read when he was a kid. Not that he's any more grown up than he was back then.

He hadn't even started thinking about her in that way until..what was it? The week before the whole incident with that weird girl who kept picking fights with Sarada? He'd heard the story from Mitsuki, at least. Yes, around then, when she promised him that she'd always be there for him.

His dad hadn't shown up for another one of his mom's birthdays. Hinata didn't dare reveal what year she was turning to her kids, but let (after less than a few seconds) Himawari and Boruto split the first piece of cake upon seeing their dejected faces.

Naruto hadn't even bothered with a shadow clone either. And the rest of the night passed by with Boruto's hackles raised, the metaphorical elephant in the room only making moods sour as the hours ticked by.

Boruto had ran out of the house after they had given up waiting. By then, it was 23:00. And, don't ask him why, he ran off in the direction of Sarada's house. When he got there, he stood under the Uchihas' roof for an uncomfortable minute before realizing _where the hell he was, and Sarada would never let him live this down for the rest of his life!_ and ran towards the woods near her house, ironically, the same woods he was in now.

He didn't feel _uncomfortable_ around her like other girls. Obviously, the sworn rival kind of uncomfortable was very much present, but the "uncomfortable" he was talking about was the opposite sex kind of uncomfortable. The uncomfortable that, even though he knew her back when both of them were just taking their first steps, Sarada was.. _of the female population_.

Back then, in that moment, he had thought _he didn't need friends,_ _ **especially**_ _not a girlfriend_. Not that he even thought of her in that way, of course! Not when he had a reputation to uphold, either. An ego to protect.

Apparently, Sarada had seen him through the same window Boruto had broken in through what felt like _months_ ago, right before she was going to go to bed, and immediately took off after him, saying that he looked _"pathetic, but not your natural pathetic. You shouldn't ever be_ _ **that**_ _pathetic."_ He had laughed out a tear, which she had wiped away but never brought back up and so it had stayed in the silence between the two of them since then.

And he _had_ been pathetic, he'll admit. But she corrected him, even after telling him herself that he was being pathetic. In fact, she had said,

 _"Boruto, believe it or not, everyone has their moments. Except me, of course, but most people."_

Her smile had hit him like fucking concrete. Or whatever. Something really hard. In that precious moment, she didn't have any scratches on her face like she did now, her skin looked healthier, livelier, pinker, and her eyes had seemed gentle and compassionate and it was almost like the sun was shining down on them even though it was almost midnight-

She was _beautiful_. And then a bunch of shit happened that messed that up. Well, she was still beautiful, kind of, but Boruto's top priority was to hunt that smile down until it came back.

But, that smile was long gone, by the looks of her.

Girls are so, so, _weird_.

"Sarada, stop, Jesus Christ, what are you doing?!"

She was throwing up next to a fucking rock on her knees, and Boruto prayed to God that the shit ton of blood on that rock was more dramatic than the situation actually was.

By the looks of it, the very least was that that hand wasn't going to be handy for a while, at least not without medical attention.

Sarada couldn't bring herself to even lift her head from the thick, yellowed mucus-slob dangerously close to her face. A string of saliva hung loosely from the corner of her lips, still connecting her to her own puke, shoulders heaving with a reluctant tenseness. Her wet hair clung sickeningly to her head and neck. If her hair has ever been alive, it was definitely dead now.

"S-Sarada?" He was crying now, again. Hell, he knew he had been sinking to all-time lows lately, but this was ridiculous. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to give a single shit. _Please, let her smile, please_. _There's still gotta be hope for her yet._ "Sarada, are you okay?"

"Sarada, talk to me! Now! _Please_!" He didn't dare step any closer than he already did. Now that he had a closer look at the horrific scene in front of him, he could see a bloody mix of broken bone and mangled flesh next to-it was _her hand_. _God, if you exist, I'm begging you._

Her cheeks lifted and her nose scrunched up, and Boruto could see the faint outline of the curve of a smile at the corner of her mouth. As if reading his mind, she turned her head as much as she could and presented a full-out grin, but it wasn't the same. This smile didn't radiate. It dulled.

And that's when he couldn't stand by any longer, he made the right decision, yes, he did, and he was pretty sure he was still crying (again, again) when he hugged her.

* * *

When Sarada blinked, she could've sworn she was staring her mother's dead, morbidly caved-in face. But now she was in the hospital, in what looked like the same room she was in last time. Then again, aren't all hospital rooms supposed to look the same? But she was certain that this room was the only one with those specific holes in the walls. It was a weird feeling. She couldn't explain how, but she just knew.

Someone was sobbing in the distance, and Sarada's ears rung. Her sight was blurry without her glasses.

She slumped against her hospital bed in exhaustion, then tensed up at the shooting pain that ran up her arm.

Oh god.

Oh _god_. Oh _no._

She had to be dreaming, or hallucinating, or living in some sort of imaginary, fucked-up world inside her own psycho head. She couldn't be seeing right. This wasn't real.

 _It's not real, it's not, it's not-!_

Oh god. It felt real. Sarada experimentally tried to move her thumb, but found that her muscles hadn't even twitched at the command.

She was going to be sick.

Okay, so she was definitely out of her fucking mind, _she had to be_. Why else-and _how_ else-would she be able to do this to herself? Scratching herself was one thing, destroying her entire fucking _arm_ was another. Even if it had been on purpose, the pain usually would've kicked in by then and made her _stop_.

It didn't look too bad, now that white bandaging held the pieces together prettily. But then Sarada was remembering what it _was_. What it _had been. In that forest._

The sobbing was getting louder. It was coming near her room.

Part of her hoped it passed right by her, and another part desperately wished that whoever it was came into her room. She didn't want to be alone, but she didn't want to have to comfort someone else either. Hell, she'd be happy if the person just came in, pressed the nurse call button for her, and left.

Sarada could move her other arm, the one closest to the call button, just fine. Stupidly, Sarada found herself too scared to move another inch. Scared as if that, alone, somehow, would jumpstart the unimaginable pain that was to come inevitably as a consequence of doing.. _this_.

As the footsteps grew closer, and the sobbing grew surprisingly quieter, as if the person didn't want others to know that they were crying, Sarada laid in tense, still, silence. Her eyes couldn't even make out the door from her spot on the hospital bed.

Then, it fucking bitch-slapped her. _Before getting here, she had been staring into the dead eyes of her own mother, and one of them had popped like a goddamn pimple, just lying there, irreversible. Did someone else get to her?! Was she in another room?_

 _Sarada needed to go see her._ She needed to apologize, she needed to tell her how much she loved her, _that she didn't mean it, and she would do anything, just please,_ _please_ _forgive her_ and let their family go back to the way it used to be. They used to be _so happy._

The door opened, and by the gritting teeth and wheezy sniffles, Sarada assumed it was the mystery guest of honor that she had been listening to this whole time.

" _Mom_?"

Sakura was a mess trying to be anything but.

Sarada's face lost all former tension and smoothed with overwhelming relief upon seeing her mother's face. Both eyes were still intact, the only thing wrong with them was that they were both really swollen and red from crying. Her watery smile quivered and her eyes started to tear up and burn, and Sarada was _so, so glad_.

 _Oh, thank god.._

" _Mom_.."

"Sarada, you're awake." So, so cold. Sarada's eyes widened, barely conscious of the fact that a few tears had just fallen from her eye, simply acknowledging that _were her cheeks always this wet?_ She felt the sudden urge to get up, snatch the IV out of her injured arm, and stagger up to Sakura to clearly see her face right now.

She needed to know. She needed to know how to help.

And, to think, she even thought that someone should be comforting _her_ , right?

"Mom-"

"Just wanted to let you know that you won't be leaving this very room for at least a week. After that, we'll see where you're at and act accordingly."

"What? Mom, let me-"

"Enough, Sarada!" She was used to hearing her mother's angry voice and angry tone, especially the natural pose she unconsciously took on whenever she was mad. But that had been different.

Never, had Sarada, _ever_ , seen Sakura angry enough to yell in a shaky voice.

 _Oh god._

The floor dropped from under her, and Sarada immediately swallowed quietly. Sakura never looked so serious either.

"You're staying here and that's that." Her stark white, clenched fists shook at her sides as she stiffly pivoted around and began to exit the room. She stopped abruptly in front of the white door, heavy breathing starting to pick up and resound throughout the small room.

"I'll be back in a couple hours to see how you're doing." A pause. "Or not. Maybe another nurse here will."

She was gone, and the door had shut without even a single creak.

Sarada stared at the white door blankly. And she was back with that goddamn nothingness that led her to this point in the first place.

As if that couldn't be any worse, her own mother hated her guts now too.

Sarada isn't sure if she even did beat Sakura's face into oblivion or if she didn't.

Sakura could've gotten healed with her power combined with the other nurses at the hospital with the amount of time Sarada had probably been passed out.

If she had, her mother would have a pretty reasonable grudge to hold against her and everybody, even herself, would cry just looking at her own demonic face. And she'd probably throw up again. Multiple times, in fact.

If she hadn't, her mother still hated her and she still would never get that image erased from her nightmares. And she was officially insane. And she'd probably throw up again in this situation too.


End file.
